John Cena is....TEH MAREEN!!11!

[Random Ninja]

Seriously. What...the...fuck.

Hulk Hogan was an American Icon, The Rock, while somewhat of a dubious actor in his early days, is respectable, and a skilled actor, as well as action star. He made a great hero, and an excellent Villian.

But...John Cena? Seriously. John 'White Boy Crack Baby' Cena? WHAT THE FUCK!? The guy is still a wrestler, he doesn't NEED to be in a movie. He can't even act like a freakin' degenerate thugga' rappa' homeslice, which he apparently is, and now they're trying to make him an ex-military man?

I predict this movie will suck hairy donkey testicles, but it will still make millions due to the hardcore fans that still claim wrestling is real while they do donuts in their monster trucks.

But maybe I'm wrong. Can anyone explain to me the subtle charm and nuances of this film? Am I totally backwards? Is enlightenment about this incredulous piece of videographic novelization just beyond my minds capacity for understanding?

*edit* Wait...crap. I put this in the wrong forum, didn't I? Can someone move it?

[POS Industries]

Well, I dunno if it's necessarily in the wrong forum, as pro wrestling more or less operates by cartoon logic most of the time anyway. And I'm saying this as a fan (yes, I know it's fake and kinda stupid, but so is most anime so shut up already), so don't get your knickers in a twist, all two (maybe) of you other wrestling fans on here.

Anyway, having watched the trailor, I'm left wondering how much of that stuff they really teach you in the Marine Corps. Specifically, does Flarecobra, for instance, know how do deliver a flying chokeslam? I'll be waiting for an answer.

[Satan's Onion]

Well, the odds probably aren't in this project's favor, but stranger things have happened. I mean, before his first book came out, who'd of thought that Mick Foley (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mick_Foley) was actually a really good writer (especially for someone who'd taken as many blows to the head as he's done)?

And, POS: It's not "stupid", it's over-the-top. It's a soap opera that men can watch without their sexuality being ridiculed (which is a bit odd, as it's kinda all about two sweaty men in tights groping each other), 'cos people get hit with chairs in it.

[POS Industries]

Hey, I'm just quoting the people that look at me aghast when I reveal my appreciation for it. As I said: Knickers + Twist = No.

Yeah, I don't exactly have high hopes for this movie though. Might be a fun enough ride, though, worth a rental. Cena looks like a doof throughout the trailor, but Robert Patrick tends to be fairly good. So, you know, there's that.

[Satan's Onion]

Sorry, forgot to add smilies to that last post ^^' . 'S all right, I occasionally get the odd look thrown my way for my enjoyment of pro wrestling (tho' you'd think all those sweaty athletic men with bare chests would appeal to more females than it appears currently watch :p ) It's marvellous stuff if you can really suspend your disbelief--even more marvellous when you can't ^_^ .

I'm looking forward to this project, myself; maybe John Cena will become the next "Rowdy" Roddy Piper (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hell_Comes_to_Frogtown) of acting =P !

[POS Industries]

Maybe, but I see Cena more as saying, "I've come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of ass."
MST3K for teh win!
Me? I'm still a supporter of Kane's film career. Which reminds me, I need to check out that movie of his one of these days.

[Satan's Onion]

Kane movie? I think my mother grabbed a novelization of a Kane movie from the library. I asked her to lend it to me if it turned out to be sufficiently rich in unintentional humor.

[Random Ninja]

Citizen Kain isn't what we're talking about. =P

Also, I used to like wrestling, back when there was more ass kicking and less emo-ness. Now I can't even sit through ten minutes of Smackdown without changing the channel.

My best bud went and saw the Kane movie, I think. He said it was pretty gorey, but I don't know if that accurately translates to 'scarey'.

[EVILNess]

Every fiber of my being screams out, asking "Why?"

But then I realize its been a while since a good ole' fashioned Action Flick came out. It seems the last 6 months has been nothing but rapid fire based-on-true-stories-CGI-Kid-friendly-sports-themed mush. There are a few notable exceptions, but I basically haven't been to the movies since May (I did see Superman and Pirates).

I, for reasons that I cannot entirely fathom myself, want to go see this movie.

I think I might just need some plothole filled mind numbing action, where the hero is chiseled and has that specific kind of chin*, and has an unflappable moral compass. Freud might say I have penis envy, but in the end who knows?


*Seriously, Cena has the "hero chin" thing down.

[Mauve Mage]

But then I realize its been a while since a good ole' fashioned Action Flick came out. It seems the last 6 months has been nothing but rapid fire based-on-true-stories-CGI-Kid-friendly-sports-themed mush. There are a few notable exceptions, but I basically haven't been to the movies since May (I did see Superman and Pirates). Yeah. Sports mush and war movies, or rescue servicemen movies. And now we've got the whole slew of bad horror movies coming out around Halloween. I went to go see Fearless last weekend, and every single trailer was for a stupid horror flick. Texas Chainsaw Massacre sequel, the Grudge II, some other crap about.. I don't remember... a girl being possessed by a murderer's ghost or something. All CRAP!! And this Marine crap doesn't look that great either.

I haven't seen a good movie since Pirates. Well, okay, Fearless wasn't bad. But nothing else. DAMMIT HOLLYWOOD!! DO SOMETHING GOOD!!!

[Magus]

What's the plot of this movie, hostages or trapped behind enemy lines?

Why don't they blow up stuff anymore? Tarantino's Dirty Dozen rip-off is going to be the closest to it in years.

EDIT: Oh, wait, I forgot about the great American classic, In The Army Now starring Pauly Shore and Andy Dick where they blow Hussein's (or generic arab dictator who is supposed to bring to mind Hussein) super-missile bunker of death.

[Random Ninja]

I liked the Doom movie. The Rock got killed X3

Also, the plot is 'omg, terrorists kidnapped my wife!' or some shit.

[Flarecobra]

I see it as a generic revenge/vendetta flick....and to answer your question, nope. While in our Martial Arts program there is some wresling moves, it's more like the Greco-roman style that you did back in High School then what you see on TV.

And one of my co-workers said that it's probably got a bit of properganda thrown in, making kids that "OMG! IF I JOIN ZE MARINES I CAN HAVE MAD SKILLZ LIK DAT!"
Bullshit.... I've got what amounts to an office job....

[Random Ninja]

The whole CQC stuff I learned back in my short stead in the military correctional facility after my expulsion has taught me this.

People in the army are dicks. Most of the time.

This movie seems to be trying to give the idea that any wigger with an addiction to being people up and seeing things explode would make the perfect jarhead. I tend to agree in the simplest of respects. Wigger's can take bullets just as good as anyone, and if they die, at least the national IQ average will go up.

[Flarecobra]

Well, to counter your arguement, I've worked with a lot of grunts, and some of those guys are some of the smartest people I've met. They just feel like taking the fight to the enemy is the best way they can serve.

But you are right, it will cause a bunch of Yoo-hoos to think that they can pull off similor shit if they join the Marines.

[Random Ninja]

Well, while I'm all for the military, I'm not so much for 'attack first, attack later, attack some more, and then when everyone's dead, check and see if they were actually a threat' approach to the American military.

I think there needs to be more intelligent people and less military people in charge of the military. I know that sounds weird, but it's what we need.

[Flarecobra]

Agreed....Like they say, "What's Military Inteligence?"

Typos included.