8-bit fanfics [Archive] - Nuklear Power Forums

Seran

01-14-2006, 09:28 PM

It was a fine, quiet day in the kingdom of Corneria. For reasons unknown, the Light...bulb...Warriors had decided to return to what was supposed to be Corneria, or Thieferia in Thief's case, but it didn't seem to matter to them now. As they stood on the bridge, staring out at the river, silence settled and overwhelmed them. None of them wanted to speak about their previous experience, whatever it was. Among the group was Thief, Black Mage, and Red Mage, each one avoiding one another's gaze. From the other end of the bridge, White Mage watched them, wondering to herself. It didn't look as though they were going to move very soon; and Fighter was not there either. Fighter was expected to be in at least Black Mage's company. He, after all, thought that they were best friends, tied together by the mischievous threads of fate.
-
No, in fact, Fighter was at the end opposite of White Mage's, with a fishing rod in his hands. He looked positively happy, his eyes glittering with oblivious bliss. His red hair was brushed by the gentle wind, carrying an awful scent from who-knew-what, while it pushed the fishing line a bit to the west. He gazed out down King Steve's Kickass Bridge, smiling widely to himself, as he sat with his legs out in front of him. As the water washed past the banks of the river, he felt something pull down on the line. Immediately, excitement took him, and he started yelling as he pulled on his fishing rod, falling onto his back. "Hey guys! I think I've caught something!" That was possibly the ninth time he had said the very same thing; and so his fellows ignored him. Instead, Fighter fell onto his back, pushed himself up, and looked at the end of the fishing line, which had a little sword figure tied to the end of it. "Aw, it got away again..." Fighter picked up the tiny sword, which slightly lifted the line, and he glanced back at the other three. "I don't think the bait's working, guys!" He gained no response, then looked back at the ground, trying to summon some sort of idea.
-
As the three stared gloomily at the sparkling, blue horizon, Black Mage felt a very familiar presence behind him. He quickly whirled around as he felt someone's long robe sleeve brush past him, and watched while White Mage walked on by. His mood quickly lightened up as he gave her an overjoyed look of his eyes, his unseen face hinting at some sort of obnoxious grin that was most likely not there.
"Hey!" he yelled out, although it was not necessary.
"Shut up," White Mage muttered, not wishing to have any further contact with him. "I'm here only for Fighter, not for you."
"For Fiiiyeee-fuh-fuh-fuh-fwha?"
"Fighter."
"But...why! He's an incompetent fool who believes in nothing but the use of his stupid swords, which he obviously wields for the cause of nothing but good and nobility!"
"Exactly. And besides, he's trying to fish."
"Fishing?" Black Mage echoed. "Fishing!"
"Well, at least he handles his stress in some way. He doesn't stand around and be quiet about it. He also doesn't wreak an endless tide of wrath and destruction." She walked farther away, but Black Mage stumbled after her, tripping over his robes and clutching the tail of hers.
"Nooo!" he yelled. "Wait! I can handle my stress and not leave a terrible woeful tide of heartless chaos and dismay! Just give me a chance."
"Let go of my robes. I've already given you enough chances as it is."
"But...he's an idiot!"
"No."
"But..."
White Mage snatched her robe's tail away, and continued down the bridge. Black Mage laid there, his face in the ground, his hat limping off but not enough to reveal any part of his twisted expression. Red Mage seemed to be suppressing laughter. Black Mage sighed, not looking at them, but did hear the occasional snigger from Red Mage. He growled, his right gloved hand twitching to grab his knife, then pushed himself onto his rump and yelled out at Red Mage.
"What!"
"Hehe...mehehe...you looked so desperate...hehe...it was disgraceful...hee..." Thief shook his head at Red Mage, as though feeling sorry for him. Thief thought that Red Mage's mind had cracked ever since their experience before they had come upon King Steve's Kickass Bridge, which would have possibly explained Red Mage's little moments of cracking up, and breaking out into hysteric laughter. At that very moment, he didn't seem done, since he was already giggling at Black Mage's futile attempts to gain attention from White Mage.
"Pathetic?" Black Mage repeated angrily. He stood up, his fingers curling into his palms, his hands becoming fists. "Pathetic! Are you calling me pathetic! I'll show you pathetic with a massive dose of HADO -- "
There was immediately a vague blur racing past Black Mage, from where Thief had once been. Now Thief was gone, and he was suddenly standing behind Black Mage, who turned around and jumped, enraged at his new position.
"What did you steal!"
"I didn't steal anything," he answered confidently. "Oh, and don't turn back on that certain rule that should be unbreakable. Never question me about what I've stolen unless I'm willing to answer."
"And you're not willing to answer."
"Never question me about that either."
"Mehwee...hehe...hee...haha...haha! Mwuahahahwaha!"
"Shut it, you annoying aristocrat-clothed moronic idiot! Can't you see I'm trying to debate with our filthy elven leader over here!"
"What did you call me?"
"I called you a filthy elven leader!"
"Oh, alright. I thought you called me a traitorous rat who liked to pick the pockets of unsuspecting victims who are obviously you under my command, with a terrible heritage that is worthy of not ever existing!"
"Yeah, that's what I said!"
"Or maybe you said you were a filthy blue wh -- "
"That's it! Let's go! One-on-one!"
"Bring it, you inferior non-elf punk!"
"Meeeeeheheheee..." Red Mage looked down at the item in his hands. He knew what Thief had stolen. He definitely knew what Thief had stolen. "Gyahahee...this is useless...no stat boost at all...but a big gain in Knife-wielding skill...or maybe...or maybe I got my skills mixed...mwehehe..."
"My knife?" Black Mage looked at Red Mage, then back at Thief. "You stole my knife? That's mutiny!"
"You were never the captain of his party!"
"But you never became leader in a fair way!"
"As if you were ever fair!"
-
"Hi, White Mage!" Fighter stood up, still smiling while he continued to clutch the fishing pole in his hands. White Mage walked up, trying to put up a kind smile of her own as she approached. "What are you doing here? I'm trying to catch a fish, but my sword-bait won't work!"
White Mage managed the smile she needed. "Why, Fighter," she commented as nicely as possible, "you're such a clueless little sheath full of so much unimaginable joy. Would you like me to help you with fishing?" She looked away, recalling something that saddened her every time she remembered it. She, at that moment, was still trying to cope with the fact she had failed to save Black Belt from death. There was nothing she could have done. She couldn't bring someone from the dead when they were in little pieces...and the second time...the second time was so horrible...
"Sure! I don't know what you meant by that, but I did understand the sheath part." Fighter grinned even more. "A sheath is the sweet, sweet home for a nice, shiny sword! Like mine! My shiny sword has a cozy little homes called a sheath! My shiny Stabby is sure proud of its sheath! Oh, and I'm sure Slashy loves his home also..."
"Yes, yes," White Mage cut in, trying not to let Fighter ramble on about his beloved blades. "Back to fishing then."
"Oh, yeah."
"What did you use for the bait?"
"The shiny mini-sword." Fighter sat down and picked it up, showing it to White Mage as she sat down next to him. "It's shiny, and fish like shiny things. They're sorta shiny too, right?"
"Well, maybe." White Mage took the little sword from him. "But fish don't want things that are shiny, Fighter."
"They don't?"
"No. Fish want food. And one kind of food they want is worms."
"Worms? But worms aren't shiny."
"But for fish, worms are tasty."
"Hm..." Fighter looked down at the ground, then took out his sword. "No, no wait...if I used Stabby to dig, Stabby would become less shiny..." White Mage chuckled quietly.
"You could use something else, perhaps."
"Hm..." Fighter raised his head. "HEY, BM!" White Mage immediately sighed at the mention of Black Mage's shortened name, but tried to endure the pain nonetheless. "Could I borrow your knife!"
"No!" was the answer, but someone was already there. A hyper Red Mage, giggling, jumping up and down in place.
"Mwehehe! H-here, you can borrow it..."
"That's my knife you -- ARRGH, MAH DELICATE MAGE'S RIBCAGE!"
White Mage looked at Fighter. "I'll be back, okay? I'll have to make sure no one is killed in the fight, and I have to abide by my oath by healing anyone who is hurt. Black Mage -- " her eye twitched as though she were being slightly tormented, " -- obviously sounds hurt, so I'll leave you for a moment. Red Mage, you stay with him. What happened to you, by the way?"
"Lost...character...sheet..."
"But don't you have nearly ten copies of it?"
"Copies...burned..."
"Oh...I'm so sorry to hear that, Red Mage...I'm sure that you'll recover your original, or the gods will spare you and give you another one..."
"A...noth...er...?"
White Mage turned around and walked towards the bloody fight that was commencing.
"Whoa! What did they do to start that kind of fight?"
"They..." Red Mage turned around, his unusual laughter gone. "Well, Fighter, they are obviously engaged in mortal combat! What more does it take for something like that to happen when it comes to the two of them? Black Mage hates Thief, as mentioned millions of times before! Black Mage, hating Thief, most likely spewed an insult that drove Thief to therefore retaliate, and they then engaged in -- "

Major Blood

01-15-2006, 12:29 AM

I don't think stories like that are unwanted everywhere else. In fact, i think people would applaud a story so well detailed. Just when people post stupid things like...

:fighter: OMG I LIEK TEH SWORDS!!!!11
:bmage: YU ARE TEH STUPID I WILL HADOKEN YOUZORS

Seran

01-15-2006, 11:25 AM

Well, thank you for the compliment. The thread said 8-bit Fanfics, so I figured I should post up an actual 8-Bit fanfiction story here. Part Two might be coming soon...

Now that I've noticed other non-script fanfictions, I can only say, "Not much difference except for more new threads."

WingedLion

02-09-2006, 07:51 AM

Regarding the last episode...

:rmage: Hmm BM?
:bmage: yes?
:rmage: can you cast the Hadoken with just one hand? As Far as I know with my awesome +20 knowledge in Arcana and Massive destruction spells you need both hands
:bmage:*seconds later* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Jared Todd

02-09-2006, 10:58 AM

:bmage:*walk* *walk* *walk* We're lost, you know that, right?
:fighter:No we're not. Look, here's a sign. *points it it*
"Armor of Invincibility ahead, inside the Cave of No Return -->"
What the--..!! That's not how the script goes..!!!
Let's go! *runs*
Wah-- ..weh-- .. Fighter; wait up, will you...!? *runs with after him*

Both come upon a cave, and enter it, finding battles with fierce mice and deadly vampire bats that don't actually suck blood from humans, only animals because it's a myth that vampire bats bite humans!
Reaching a light source upon a pedestal, they gasp.
*gasp!* Hey, look, someone's already taken it! I wonder who.....
I think I have a pretty good idea.... *turns and starts walking out*
Wait, hey, don't you want to solve this Martin Mystery??
*stops* You already know who took it. *turns* It was you! *brass instrument chord*
*rubs head* .. you lost me, Mage. Why would I be looking for an Armor of Invincibility I already have? That'd be stupid.
You're stupid! Look at you!
*looks down* ... I'm looking, but all I can see is the cuirass I found the other day in this weird cave I visited and my shiny boots.
... buffoon... *turns and walks away, grumbling*
I like 'em 'cause they're shiny..

I think that's sufficient enough..... I was thinking of their voices as I was typing. This is their personalities as I see them from the earlier comics. The reason BM can't hurt Fighter could be that he already HAS the armor of invincibility. Although that theory's probably been thrown around enough.

Seran

02-09-2006, 05:12 PM

"They're engaged?" Fighter repeated with such a subdued, surprised blink, Red Mage could only return the most awkward of stares.
"N...never mind...Why do I even bother...?" Soon, they heard a disturbing sound from far off, and all the fighting had abruptly come to a halt.
"...bbbuuuurrbbbbllllbbb...."
"What happened?" Fighter jumped to his feet, clutching Black Mage's dagger in his hand. "What happened?" He peered over the bridge towards Black Mage, Thief, and White Mage, noticing a great crimson fountain spurt up from the ground. He cautiously hopped forward in an attempt to get a closer look, but Red Mage jumped forward and grabbed him by the back of his cuirass.
"Ahem, Fighter, this looks as though it will get a little messy. Perhaps you should go back to fishing."
"Oh, yeah! I was getting...uh..."
There was a pause, during which Fighter stood, staring at the stone ground. The stone didn't help him remember he was supposed to be digging for worms.
-
"That should teach you two to be so immature!"
White Mage stood over the bodies of Thief and Black Mage, both gurgling with blood in unison. Her hammer was waving threateningly over her shoulder, her eyes narrowed in anger, and blood was staining her pure white robes. She bothered to glance down to notice, and sighed exasperatedly. "Oh...I'll have to wash these again..."
Black Mage attempted at pained speaking, but only succeeded in more gurgling.
"Shut up, I know what you may have wanted to say." White Mage sighed again, with more breath this time, and muttered under her breath. "Lousy White Mage's oath..." Moving her gaze towards the two, she raised her hand, placed her hammer beneath her robes, and flicked her wrist briefly. "Cure-2!" Sparkles of blue shot out, settled upon the two, and their wounds quickly sealed before her eyes, their bones mending smoothly and their organs fucntioning once more. Thief let out a wheezy exhale, and Black Mage's chest rose rapidly with a gasp of air. White Mage lowered her hand, and quickly shifted her hood mildly, as it was becoming uncomfortable. "I'd love to leave to wash my robes, but I can't trust you two to not hurt each other."
"Want me to wash them for you?" Black Mage promptly asked.
-
"No, good man, what are you doing! Are you trying to hack your hand off!"
"No, I'm trying to dig."
"But stabbing the ground like that will get your hand chopped off in an instant!"
"But Black Mage always stabbed me, and I think I remember him saying something about digging into my armor with his dagger. So I figured stabbing would work, 'cause it also digs."
"Just...no, Fighter. Look, you need to adjust your motion to a curving movement, so that the dagger will actually slide into the dirt and lift it when you lift it." Red Mage took Fighter's hand firmly, trying to demonstrate how to do so. Having full control over Fighter's hand, he did what he had said -- forced the motion into a curving movement that hacked into the dirt, and not the other hand.
"Thanks, RM!" Fighter exclaimed happily and did as he was told. "How long is it gonna take until I find a worm for the fish?"
"Uh...Just be patient." Red Mage raised his head at the sound of Black Mage being flung into the water, caused by a bone-crushing blow from White Mage's hammer. "Ooh. That does not look pleasant."
"Like I said, he's not good at talking with girls. Then he said he hated us all."
"I think I can recall for myself, if you will. Now don't bother me and keep digging for a wormy. I only said that because it rhymes and would distract you from everything else."
"Huh?"
"Like I said."
"Look!" Fighter, still on his knees, pulled an earthworm out of the ground and showed it to Red Mage, who turned to lend attention to Fighter. "A worm. What do I do with it now?"
Red Mage turned around and quickly whipped out a quill, but as he stood there, staring at his empty hand, he suddenly realized his character sheet was no longer there. Devastated, he simply stood there, gazing with stunned horror at his hand, and whimpered. "I think I'm going to cry now."
"You wanna help me catch a fish?"
"No, thank you."
"Okay. More fish for me. You hungry? I'm starved. That's why I'm catching fish. 'Cause, like, fish is a good source of protein."
"Please stop talking."
"And I really want to catch one, you know?" Fighter crawled over to his fishing pole, pinned the worm to his little sword figure, and tossed the line into the river. "I've never fished before. No one ever tried to teach me. I think I asked my teacher once, I can't remember, I can't remember his name either, but anyway, as I was saying, no one taught me to fish before, you know? And what better experience than to learn by yourself?"
"Stop it."
"Oh, but there's always the big chance of making a whole ton of mistakes...I mean, really! It's really hard learning on your own."
"I really am going to cry."
"But now all I have to do is wait. I forget what you're supposed to do when you're waiting, so..."
Dread filled poor Red Mage.
"Swordswordswords, swords swords, swordswordswordswords swords I like swords swordswords badadada swordswords...."
Red Mage threw his head back and screamed.
"Yaaaaaaaaaaaugh!"

Jared Todd

02-09-2006, 05:41 PM

lol!! I laughed through that whole last part. Even if it wasn't supposed to be funny. It was funny.

Seran

02-09-2006, 07:39 PM

I try my best at humor. More of my skills lie in gloom and misfortune...and solemnity.

Robert Paulson

02-10-2006, 04:41 PM

BlackMage stood, pondering. He and the others had just reached another village to rest and buy supplies. Thief had gone off to 'procure' more funds, RedMage went around talking to the locals, hoping he'd be sent off on another so-called 'sidequest,' Fighter was blowing off their hard-earned gil on yet another useless collection of swords, which left BlackMage alone, overlooking the outskirts of town.

He thought to himself, how can I possibly rid myself of these inferior ones and, at the same time, convince WhiteMage to hump me furiously? But before he could elaborate further, the most horrible words uttered by the most horrible voice shattered his train of thought, "Hey BlackMage! Hey BlackMage!" BlackMage whirled around to see the thing he dread most; the all-too-cheery grin of Fighter McWarrior. BlackMage narrowed his eyes at Fighter, asking, "Fighter, do I dare ask?" "I don't know, do you?" was Fighter's response. This only made BlackMage even angrier than he was. Fighter continued, "Anyways, I was at this place, it's like a guild for inventors, and I showed them my swordchucks, and you know what? They're gonna make a whole bunch of swordchucks, and sell them all throughout the world, and I get a little bit of gil for each swordchuck sold! Isn't that great?"

BlackMage could not believe what he was hearing. This ingrate, who can't even count to two, let alone carry a conversation, has now earned financial security all because of his flatout retarded idea of two swords joined by a chain. He couldn't control himself any longer. Like a beast driven with a lust for bloodshed, he reached for his dagger and began stabbing at Fighter mercilessly. Fighter laughed, and told the psychotic stabber, "Silly BlackMage, you know your knife can't penetrate my armor! But, if you wanna practice your mad stabbing skills on your best friend for life, I'll let you!" BlackMage's eyes were now conveying a look of intense, visceral hatred and blind insanity. After a minute or so of fruitless stabbing, BlackMage went down to the ground, exhausted. He looked up at Fighter and said, almost as if he were crying, "DAMMIT FIGHTER! WHY WON'T YOU JUST DIE!!!???" Fighter happily replied, "You gotta admit, I'm a pretty hard guy to kill!" With this realization, BlackMage came to realize that this was going to be yet even another one of those long, painful days . . . .

To be continued . . .

dark butterfree

02-15-2006, 04:02 AM

i must applaud all of the people, who have written such good stories. i mean, i can't write that good unless i'm in WRITER'S MODE, and that happens very rarely. way to go.

and now, non-writers-mode storytime!

:fighter:: I aM teh FigHtar! i Liek sworDs.
:thief::i Am t tHeiv, I du Stealded aLL Ur monEy Liek a THEif.
:bmage:: U R HadoKended, Guys.
:fighter:: I arE HadoKended...

sorry, couldn't help it...

Seran

02-19-2006, 07:31 PM

Red Mage collapsed to his knees, fell onto his side, and curled up, pulling his head to his chest with his hands. He started to weep as Fighter stared down at him as though he were some sort of lunatic who had lost all sanity, and was coping with the madness around him by crying. Fighter knelt down to him and prodded him gently in the shoulder, concerned that Red Mage was in such a position.
"You okay?" he asked dully.
Red Mage simply continued to cry.
"Kay then." Fighter returned to the fishing pole and grasped it lightly in both of his hands, casting his gaze out to the river. His cheerful expression made it seem as though absolutely nothing different had happened, and he watched the clouds drift by silently while White Mage screamed from the middle of the bridge. What he heard was:
"Some day, I'm going to crush every single little bone in your body and you'll regret the day you ever started being fresh with me, little man!"
Fighter didn't know what she meant by that, but he considered that to be a good comment. Not worried, he started humming to himself. The breeze was light and it hummed with him in an endless tune, accompanied by the crying of Red Mage, the screaming of White Mage, and the shouting of Black Mage. Thief's voice was barely heard as he attempted to prevent White Mage from throwing herself into the river just to bash Black Mage to death using her massive hammer. Fighter could plainly see White Mage flailing her arms out in a desperate move to jump into the water. He, nonetheless, paid no attention to her or Thief as he focused his attention on the sky and the river below. His gaze slowly floated up to the sky above him, only to be met with a sun hiding behind a thin layer of clouds, and he drew his eyes away. The sunlight really could hurt someone's eyes. While he waited patiently, he heard Black Mage climb onto the shore on the other end of the river. Looking up, he waved merrily in greetings to Black Mage.
-
Black Mage panted furiously, his eyes wide. He was not made for swimming. He was made for conjuring world-ending spells that would have worked if it weren't for destiny and fate and all that crap. Looking to the bridge, he noticed White Mage calming down with Thief clutching her sleeve. Black Mage didn't know why Thief cared, but he did know another man was holding onto his girl! Leaping onto his feet, he saw Fighter from across the river, delivered the middle finger to him rudely, and dashed away back to White Mage and Thief.
-
"Oh, no, here he comes," White Mage groaned, watching Black Mage attempt to reach them. "Let me go, I'm going to smash his fragile body to pieces and pieces!"
"Wait," Thief said, still holding her sleeve tightly in his hand. "You don't want to do that."
"Yes I do!"
"But that would be severely breaking the White Mage's Oath!"
"I don't care!"
"Yes you do! Look, be rational and think about it."
"I...I can't!"
"Fine. Instead, think that you'll be owing me 500 Gil after I let you go kill BM for his twisted little mind."
"Hold on!" White Mage exclaimed, pulling her arm away. "I am not paying that much! And nor am I going to be breaking my oath, thank you very much!"
"You're welcome."
"Thank...wait...what?"
"Hey, here he comes."
Black Mage ran up to them, panting harder than before, his second dagger pointed threateningly at Thief. "You...stay away...from...her..."
"Wha?"
White Mage smacked Black Mage back into the river. Apparently, she still wasn't giving up on throwing some pain directly into Black Mage's face. She watched him spin in the air at some speed of seventy miles per hour, plummet towards the water, and land in the river with a loud splash. Thief peered over the edge of the bridge, curious to see if Black Mage would swim to the shore again or not. With him distracted, White Mage grabbed him by the back of his collar and pushed him in. Thief fell over with a yell and was sent into the cold water, just like Black Mage, except his bones wouldn't have been crushed. White Mage watched them disappear into the river, then sighed and collapsed onto her rump, rubbing her cheek with reproach at her job as a white mage. Things were so complicated for her. Why did she have to suffer this horrible time of idiocy and chaos? Couldn't there have been someone else who was capable of handling the task? Her eyes followed the two below, her gaze first focused on Black Mage -- who was struggling with the current -- then on Thief -- who was swimming towards Fighter in an unusually calm manner. Silently, she prayed that Black Mage would not return for her. He was a wretched little monster whom she had always hoped would have at least a little humanity in him, but her doubts had been increasing with time, and at some points, would fall to the point of her believing once more that he had good inside him. Nonetheless, she stood up, leaned over the side of the bridge, and yelled down at him.
"Don't give me a reason to start slapping you!"
As she stood on the edge of the bridge, she felt the ground tremble, and glanced down with shock. Black Mage fell beneath of the surface of the river and failed to emerge.
-
Thief climbed onto land, sitting next to Fighter, who was too busy staring out to pay attention to anything. Red Mage was sniffling, but no longer weeping, and was laying on his back as he too stared at the sky. Thief glanced between the two, concerned that they did not notice the rumbling. Stupid humans, he thought to himself blandly.
"Hey, anyone feel that?"
"I can only feel my neverending nightmare of absolute despair."
Fighter did not respond.
"Well, it feels like an earthquake..."
Red Mage immediately sat up, turned his head towards Thief, and blinked for a moment. "Uh?"
"Eathquake."
"Is that something new?"
"I guess you have a point."

neyo the king

02-19-2006, 08:52 PM

Seran. Your story rocks.

You need a cookie. Someone give Seran a cookie! NOW!

Seran

02-19-2006, 08:54 PM

Aheheh...what kind of cookie is it?

I can't believe that story is still not done. But then again, what was I expecting?

...Something shorter.

Long-Haired Narcissist

02-22-2006, 07:54 PM

Seran, your story rocks. I got Space, Peanut Butter, and chocolate chip cookies. You can have one when you finish this story.

reality-is-a-variable

03-01-2006, 11:56 PM

Seran, your story depresses me. Even the funny bits depress me. I'm not sure why, I wasn't sad until i read your story but now it appears that I am. It's good, in fact its great. It just makes me really really unhappy. In a sort of "everything's hopeless" kind of way. Did you do this on purpose?

P.S. What does it matter though, keep writing them.

Seran

03-02-2006, 06:28 AM

I write depressing, I draw depressing, I empathize with depressing. I can see what you mean. Everyone has a different eye for different aspects in a story.

I would write another part, but it's the morning and I don't have forty to fifty minutes to type it out.

dark butterfree

03-03-2006, 01:46 AM

Urge to congratulate further... Rising...
I seriously can't wait for the next one. I normally hate fanfics, but your one fuels the evil withing me.
I could totally destroy San Antonio right about now. You shall get half of the spoils.
Seriously, Japan is next when you make the next one.

Seran

03-03-2006, 06:56 AM

Dark Butterfree, I never mentioned I think I'm attracted by your evil avatar. I always liked to depict Fighter in an evil Snake Kenshido mood like I had once done in the Arts and Crafts section...

+++

Fighter failed to show any, and absolutely, any sign of response at all. He was motionless, his gaze fixed on the waters below, his silence overwhelming and strangely peaceful, even as Thief swam up and sat by him. Red Mage had been furiously wiping tears from his eyes, and he was not sure, but he thought he had even seen Red Mage plunge his head into the water for a moment. He had thought he had seen it out of the corner of his eye. Yet, he showed no signs of change in his silence as Black Mage even sunk beneath the surface and never again rose. By then, he could hear White Mage shouting from a distance.
"Someone help him, he's going to drown!"
"That's ironic," Thief said with his eyes looking upon where Black Mage had disappeared. "Wasn't she the first one to -- RM?" He glanced over to where Red Mage previously was, but saw that he was suddenly gone. He glanced out to the river to see Red Mage mimicking the controlled movements of him swimming, and saw him dive underwater for a mere few seconds. The water leapt with the shaking earth, and the branches of the tree above Fighter trembled in its wake. There tremor was steadily becoming greater in strength, and all Thief could do was glance around in confusion. The line of Fighter's fishing pole ducked, and he quickly noticed, pushing himself hurriedly to his feet as something started pulling him towards the water.
"Whoa!" he yelled out with shock. Some massive marine creature was jerking his fishing pole away -- along with him, that is! Thief rose to his feet, watching Fighter being pulled closer to the edge of the river, and took no time to dive forward, grab the fishing pole, and with all of his agility, try to pull it back. The creature was obviously massive though. There was no way the two of them alone would have been able to pull up whatever the fish was!
"If this thing can stop itself from being fished out," Thief said to Fighter, "it must hold a lot of value. Pull, human, pull for the sake of yourself and your elven leader!"
"I didn't get what you said, but okay, I'm pulling!"
Fighter threw himself back, nearly forcing his spine out, but he was using all of his strength in an attempt to reclaim his fishing line and the fish he had caught. Red Mage appeared at the surface, with a Black Mage who had finally found air on his back. Black Mage clung to Red Mage's neck while Red Mage elegantly swung his arms out, his legs paddling gently which took him at a slower, more easy pace.
"Did you see that?" Red Mage called out to them, forgetting all about his character sheet and its copies. "There's this giant -- this giant thing underwater, did any of you see it!"
"No!" Thief replied in answer.
"When I say giant, I mean it! This thing is huge. Are you sure you didn't see it?"
"How far down were you?"
"All the way down to the ocean floor, baby!"
"That probably explains why you saw it!" Black Mage shouted crossly.
"Get over here and help us!" Fighter was only able to respond, his eardrums straining not to burst from the inside as he tried even harder to pull the fish out. But all that happened was that they were being pulled even closer to the edge of the water. "Crap! This thing's gonna eat us alive, isn't it!"
"Well, I --"
"Isn't it!"
"Fighter, it's probably just going t --"
"We're done for!"
"Then why don't you let go?"
Thief did this, and Fighter stared at him in actual bewilderment.
"Are you crazy? A fighter never stops trying until the very, very last moment when they really need to!"
"And don't you consider this to be your very, very last moment when you need to?"
Fighter looked at his fishing pole for a moment, and was suddenly pulled into the air. He was sent flying for a moment over the river, before the creature pulled him in. Where he had submerged, many great bubbles that were possibly his choked screams popped at the surface. Thief watched as Red Mage glanced around uneasily, then suddenly be forced into motion like something was pulling him underwater by the leg. Black Mage's eyes were wide and wary like a frightened animal, and when Red Mage went down into the cold depths, he went down into the cold depths.

Kima Azure

03-03-2006, 11:46 AM

Whoa. *Covers Seran with chocolate dip.* There you go, a Seran cookie!

Robert Paulson

03-03-2006, 01:23 PM

BlackMage got himself up after coming to terms with being unable to stab Fighter to death yet again, but before anyone could say anything, Thief appeared, carrying bags and pockets full of gil. The Elf Prince opened with, "This town is crazy. I didn't even have to try to pickpocket anyone, they just gave money to me, even weirder, it was only the women who gave me money. They kept handing me money, expecting, shall I say, favors from me, all because of my Elven blood. I've never seen this behavior before, then again, it makes sense, humans recognizing their superiors, but it was just the women though. They all kept handing me gil, saying, 'make love to me, dreamy Elf man!'" Fighter then said, "You've been making money, too? That makes two of us!"

At that precise moment, RedMage appeared in all of his pretentious glory. He started a speech, "Gentlemen, you're just in time. I spoke with the item shopkeeper of this town, and he had a favor to ask of us. Seems he left some valuables behind in a nearby forest, and he wants us to retrieve them." "What sorts of valuables are we talking about?" Thief asked. "Good question, Thief!" RedMage said. He continued, "Seems he left behind his reading glasses and some reading material. He wouldn't specify what reading material, he just said if you find some glasses with some books, bring them back to him. Thief, as the leader of our outfit, do you agree to carryout this sidequest?" Thief response was, "Sure. Anything to get me away from these Elf-crazy women." "Then it's settled!" RedMage exclaimed. Fighter took this opportunity to tell the good news, "Hey RedMage and Thief, you wanna know what I did just now?" BlackMage interrupted, "Please don't. I don't want to be reminded!" Fighter ignored BlackMage and said, "I went to this inventor's guild, I showed them my swordchucks, and now they're gonna make a whole lotta swordchucks, and sell them all around the world, and I get money for each swordchuck sold! Aren't I the greatest?" RedMage pondered and murmured to himself, "Inventor's guild you say." Then, without warning, RedMage held out his right hand, with his index finger pointed at Fighter and asked in a dramatic overtone, "Was the receptionist a young woman with brown pigtails, large bosoms and bright-blue eyes!?" Fighter was befuddled by the question, and answered, "Um, no. It was just this guy, and he," RedMage then added, "Oh. I must be thinking of a different inventor's guild. Nevermind."

After the conversation, Thief told the group, "Well then, we best be going to the nearest forest, to see about securing the shopkeeper's valuables." And then he whispered to himself with a smirk on his face, "Oh, we'll be securing those valuables alright. suckers!" RedMage then stated, "Let us be off!" And Fighter ended with, "Onward and upward!" Thief, RedMage, and Fighter began to walk off, but BlackMage stayed. Fighter asked, "BlackMage, are you coming with us?" BlackMage was distracted from his daydream involving himself and WhiteMage. He told, "Oh, um, yeah. I'll be along with you guys in just a moment." BlackMage then began to follow the other Light Warriors, but he kept his distance. Once they got out of town, BlackMage noticed that the others were walking in a single-file line, with Fighter in front, RedMage in the middle, and Thief in the rear. He realized, now was his chance. Now was his best chance to finally do away with these numbskulls, once, and for all! he thought to himself. He placed his hands in front of him, with both ends of his palms connected to each other, and shouted at the top of his lungs, "HADOKEN!" A blast of bluish-white light shot forth from his hands, heading towards the other Light Warriors. Thief, with his innate Elven senses, somehow saw the Hadoken coming for him, and he jumped out of the way just in time. RedMage also leaped away, yelling, "Reflex save!" In doing so. Fighter didn't see it coming, and was hit by the Hadoken blast. He fell down, unconscious. He looked dead. BlackMage looked and thought, well, one out of three ain't too bad, but he also saw that the Light Warrior he hit was Fighter. Joy overtook him. He started jumping around, his beady eyes closed in a jovial display, and began saying, "I did it! I finally killed Fighter! After all these years! Yes! YES!" But just then, Fighter slowly got back on his feet, his body smoldering from the Hadoken blast. He looked around in a daze, and said to himself, "Did I get shot by evil magic just now?" BlackMage stopped celebrating, seeing that his efforts were in vain yet again. RedMage told Fighter, "Thank the 16-bit Sprites for your high constitution rating. I should warn you, BlackMage is confused! He thinks we're his enemy. I don't know how or who or why, but he's in a state of confusion! Luckily, I know how to cure his status ailment." RedMage went up to BlackMage, who was now enraged seeing as how he wasted all that destructive power for nothing. RedMage did a gesture with his hand, pointed at BlackMage, and exclaimed, "Esuna!" A column of white light appeared around BlackMage, then disappeared. BlackMage couldn't understand. He questioned RedMage, "What in the Hells was that for?" RedMage responded, "You were confused, but I cured you. All is well know." BlackMage threw his arms up in disgust and said, "Are you dense? I wasn't confused. I shot that Hadoken out of my own free will." RedMage was aghast. He said out loud, "Merciful DM! He's still confused! My white magic can't save him! Quickly everyone, flee from him! Flee until his status effect wears off!" And with that, Thief, RedMage, and Fighter took off full-tilt in the opposite direction of where BlackMage was standing. Fighter yelled as they were running, "Don't take this the wrong way, BlackMage. We still love you!" BlackMage knelt down. Insanity had overtaken him once more. He began mumbling the words of a famous general, "I hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate, hate . . ."

The End. For now.

Seran

03-03-2006, 02:28 PM

Marvelous! The quotes could have been seperated by different lines, but at least each one was clarified by whomever was speaking each one. I enjoyed reading this, very humorous. Your story seems to focus on the torturing of Black Mage's feelings and luck, and that makes it even funnier!

Robert Paulson

03-03-2006, 04:18 PM

I do try to maintain the spirit of 8-bit Theater, as in: Fighter is a happy-go-lucky goofball, BlackMage gets continually shafted over and over, Thief is, well, Thief, RedMage knows just a little too much about RPGs, and I make fun of just about anything I can think of, mostly videogames. If I do a part three, (which I might.) You can rest assured that BlackMage will be tortured yet again. As for everyone else, you'll have to wait and see.

dark butterfree

03-04-2006, 01:28 AM

wewt for you both. wewt i say! WEWT!
and thanx for the compliment Seran. my avatar came about as the result of me mixing ninja sprites with fighter sprites. then adding swords.
once again, wewt.

reality-is-a-variable

03-08-2006, 07:05 PM

*Is confused* Was.... was that the end of your story Seran? I don't think so..... but maybe it's one of those strange endings that has no closure and just ends with death. Or perhaps your washing machine broke? Hopefully the second one. God what I wouldn't give for your writing skills.

CelebrenIthil

03-08-2006, 07:53 PM

I don't think it's the end, no...
But I'm really addicted to all Seran's stories! ^^

Now, let me panic a little!

AAAAAAAAAAUUUUUGGGGHHHHHH RED MAGE NOOOOOOOOOO DON'T DROOOOWWWWWNNNNNNN!!!!!! O.o
((or get eaten by some giant...underwater...meanie-thing...))

As for i_am_the_red_mage; your story was...interesting. Tough it ends weirdly. XD

Seran

03-08-2006, 09:28 PM

"This is...an awkward situation," Thief commented quietly to himself, peering over the edge of the shore. Oh, woe to those who were surely drowning beneath the water. He stared intently at the spot where Red Mage and Black Mage and disappeared, glanced to the spot where bubbles were still rising up from below, and shifted his gaze to a screaming White Mage, whose shouts had become quite indistinct. "Now who'll help me support payment for me and Elfland?" He was not daring to be curious. No, surely he would be dragged down with the others if he even tried. Looking at Black Mage's knife -- which was laying on the ground the whole time -- he considered whether or not he should find someone else to put under contract, or at least discover some way of rescuing the others. Which would thusly prove why he was their elven leader.
Below the water, all was cold, murky, and foreboding. The drowning three flailed around wildly in the water, blind and unable to see a thing. Fighter was only sinking farther to the bottom of the river, for his armor was too heavy for him to struggle his way back to the surface, and he was panicking wildly. Red Mage was caught in his own cloak, and he had absolutely no idea that Black Mage was still clinging to him like...erm...super glue!

+++
Curper: Hold on, hold on. Super glue?
Seran: I'm losing my touch. Shut up.
Curper: Just because I'm a knight doesn't mean I don't have feelings! Pfft....
+++

Getting past the interruption, Black Mage was clinging tightly to Red Mage, thereby pinning Red Mage's cloak to his own face. This prevented Red Mage from seeing anything, even the glow of golden light that seeped into existence out of nowhere. A great glow of light, much larger than them, and a high-pitched cry of some wild, underwater beast that was obviously ready to consume them with its massive, invisible jaws. Red Mage beat wildly at the water, trying not to scream his head off like Fighter was. Black Mage trembled in the cold depths, wishing he could swim. He glanced to and fro, looking for some way of getting back to the surface. He watched Fighter quickly drift on by, sinking towards the darkest part of the deep river. He was surprised the river actually was that deep, but he felt the joy in watching Fighter die first. But before the joy came the feeling of horror as a giant, black figure arose from below, its massive size easily proving to be far more larger than any ridiculous giant, its gigantic form appearing like the shadow of the apocalypse ready to claim its first victims. Black Mage could easily see Fighter screaming even more, then start choking in the water, flailing around even more. Obviously, Fighter was to die first.
All of a sudden, they were being pushed back up to the surface, back up to the light. The pressure of the water crushed their bodies against the cold, scaly skin of the enormous beast as it forced them back up to the top of the river, its piercing call ringing out to the darkness around them. Its voice echoed and lasted in their ears for a long time, muffled by the water and the rush of them being pushed to the surface. Red Mage stopped kcking, face down against the monster's head as Fighter clung to its neck, suffocating while water flodded his lungs, and Black Mage still clinging to Red Mage for dear life. Bubbles rushed by, and they steadily came closer to the light above. It was not too far now. The water felt warmer the higher they ascended, and the sun beamed down upon them as they were flung out of the water.

"Hey, look," Thief remarked, pointing at them rather cheerfully. His hand was on White Mage's shoulder. White Mage had thought, for a moment, that they were all doomed, one death partially her fault. She glanced up to see Red Mage and Black Mage spinning in the air, then landing on the shore. Fighter had climbed out as quickly as he was able to, his head limping, his lungs forcing out water in violent, uncontrolled coughs. "They're not dead after that. Wait, what's that?" A large hill rose from the water, smooth and grey. A giant water serpent rose from the river, its tall neck towering over all of them, rising high in the air like a giant, fabled beast that was illustrated only in fairy tales. Its body was more visible in the more shallow parts of the water, hidden only by the river's current. Giant flippers stretched out, waving elegantly in the current, and it turned its great, flat head down to Red Mage, who was sitting up, staring to the skies where the beast's yellow eyes were. The creature's head descended from high above, and Red Mage could clearly see its flat teeth and it opened its jaws for some reason.
"You left this behind," the creature said in a deep, powerful voice that nearly pushed him over with a marine breath. As it spoke, a sheet of paper suddenly slipped out from its mouth, dry and drifting. Red Mage watched it come to him for a moment, then quickly snatched the paper and looked at it.
"Stop holding onto me," Red Mage said bluntly. "It doesn't feel right."
"Oh, sorry," Black Mage answered, releasing his anxious grip on Red Mage, and tumbling down onto the ground. "What's that?"
"It's...it's..."
Red Mage leapt up into the air in a traditional victory dance.
"By the merciful gods, it's my character sheet!"
Black Mage immediately burned it. Red Mage stopped jumping up and down in victory, staring at his scorched hand.
"Hah, not anymore."
The sea serpent's head swayed rather playfully in response.
"You also forgot this," it said, spitting out another paper and some dice into Red Mage's hand. He glanced down at the dice, then reached up and caught the paper. It was a copy of his character sheet.
"In your face, BM!" he shouted happily, punching his hands into the air with a different dance. "Go karma! Go karma!"
Fighter sat up, coughing hard still, but as the serpent looked towards him apologetically, he said, "I think I'll call you Nessie."
"Oh, that's nice of you," it said with a mild blink.
"Just think of the possibilities!" Thief exclaimed to himself, standing upon the bridge next to White Mage. "All the money we could get through this water snake!"

CelebrenIthil

03-08-2006, 11:42 PM

Brilliant! Everyone is SO in-character! ^^

Heheheh, I like the sea serpent, he's nice.
*pats sea serpent*
((Mummy I want one too!!!)):whee:

Heh, I wonder what will happen next, but at least Red Mage isn't going to go in another psychotic fit because he has lost his character sheet. ^^
Heheheh.

Oh wait.
*slaps BM behind the head*

You ungrateful...!!!

dark butterfree

03-09-2006, 05:06 AM

it could easily end there. but if it does...
*brandishes fist*
nessie, eh... where have i heard that before... as if i don't know...
so why did i say that...
...
MAKE MORE!

Seran

03-09-2006, 06:34 AM

Loch Ness, yo.
Well, that is the end of the story...

...but if you feel like reading more for the hell of it, just head on down to the Fanstories thread.

reality-is-a-variable

03-09-2006, 08:31 PM

*cries for this truly is.....*

THE END

dark butterfree

03-09-2006, 11:33 PM

oh well, better to quit while you're ahead then... ummm... not... do... stuff...
great work.

0.0man

03-11-2006, 10:17 PM

One day in a place far far away from the world of 8-bit theater

:bmage: fighter, what are you doing?
:fighter: Talking to this guy
Hey isn't that the kid I drove insane and tortured?
0.0man no, i'm his brother's father
So your the kid I drove insane's father?
Basically, so now I'm here for revenge.
:thief: *steals from 0.0man* What the, I got nothing!!!
Of course you didn't! I like swords!
All: -_-
:rmage: I have a +20 in job knowing! He's an onion kid! but his costume is a funny color...
Fool, I'm an Onion Man! And you can't steal from me! I'm anti-thief! *notices hand is being moved on paper*
Not for long! You just signed my "you owe me everything you own" contract!
*stabs with twin onion swords*
Thanks, now can you stab Fighter?
I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!I like swords!
Sure *stabs*
thanks! HADOKEN! *hadokens 0.0man
*stabs BM
I have a +99 in fooling myself, I mean, fooling idiots!
To be continued...

Robert Paulson

03-15-2006, 02:19 PM

Fighter, RedMage and Thief were now in the forest, looking for the shopkeeper's belongings. Fighter's armor, face and hair were still singed from BlackMage's Hadoken. He reached for his pen and journal, and began writing an entry.

"Fighter's private jurnal. Don't read unless if your Fighter like me!
Today RedMage said we had to go into a forest and look for some guy's books. Thief agreed to it, and now we're on a real sidequest! BlackMage didn't come though. Instead, he shot magic at me! I got hit very hard and fell down. Then I got back up. RedMage said that BlackMage was confused and thought we were monsters. We had no choice but to run away and look for the books without BlackMage. I hope BlackMage doesn't take this the wrong way, but I'm sure he wont, since we've been friends for so long. Can't write anymore though. I think Thief found something. Okay bye!"

Thief had spotted what they were looking for; eight books and some reading glasses. He asked the group, "Why would someone leave behind things like these in a forest?" He picked up one of the books and looked through it. He observed, "Hmm, there aren't any words. It's all drawings of human women without any clothes on. But where are the Elven women? This is pathetic! Look how flawed these humans look! It hurts my eyes just looking at it!" Fighter looked through another book, "Hey, this book's about the same thing! Too bad I can't find any sword-wielding babes in here." He breathed a sigh, thinking about his ideal women. RedMage then said, "Alright! We got what we came for! Now then, let us return to the town and return these items, and who knows? We just might get a reward for this." Thief then commented, "As contractual leader, I will carry the goods, and return them myself." With the books and glasses in hand, Thief started heading back, with Fighter and RedMage in tow, but just then, a trio of spiders appeared. Dread filled within Fighter. Normally, he would've drawn his sword-chucks or his trusty blades Stabby and Slashy and be done with the monsters, but Fighter didn't have it in him. Spiders were the very bane of his existence, and he did the only thing he could do. he ran. He ran like it was a matter of life or death. He was yelling, "IT'S THE END OF CIVILIZED LIFE AS WE KNOW IT!" Thief and RedMage were close behind. RedMage added, "Although we're missing out on precious experience, it does get tiring to fight in every random encounter we have."

Meanwhile, back on the outskirts of town, BlackMage was still not thinking clearly. He remembered how sometimes RedMage spoke of a renegade general. He couldn't remember this general's name, but he could remember the quotes that RedMage attributed to this general, and that was all BlackMage could say. At the moment, he kept saying over and over, mantra-like, "I command the greatest power in the universe. You are all helpless before me." As he was reciting this, something caught his eye. It was the only thing left in the world that he didn't find repulsive; the visage of WhiteMage. He snapped out of his insanity, and approached her. He started, "Run, run, or you'll be well done, er, I meant, hey there WhiteMage!" WhiteMage glared at BlackMage, saying, "You disgust me, BlackMage. How you of all people are one of the chosen Warriors of Light is beyond even my reasoning." BlackMage then said, "That's a funny story actually, you see," At that moment, BlackMage suddenly looked away, and began talking, but not to WhiteMage, "What do you think you're doing? She's standing RIGHT THERE! And you're not the least bit interested in making ferocious love with her?" He paused, and continued in a different tone, "Well, uh, you know that feeling the mindless plebes call love? I think I'm experiencing that right now." WhiteMage stood astonisted, asking, "BlackMage?" BlackMage then shouted to himself, "Love!? You're the freakin' BlackMage! You've no time for distractions like 'love!' You're supposed to be planning to conquer the known world!" BlackMage then turned to WhiteMage, and said to her, "I'm sorry you had to see that. You've every right to question my status as a Light Warrior. I know, I used to use those nasty pickup lines on you, and I used to try to kill everyone I came into contact with, but now, I know what I really want." He paused, then exclaimed, "Let's kill off everyone except each other! We'll start the human race anew, as king and queen of Corneria, and beyond! Whadya say, huh?" WhiteMage looked down for a moment, then held her head up high, and answered, "Coming from you, that's really sweet. But my place is with the Order of WhiteMages." BlackMage said, "Then let's do away with the Order! You won't have to live chaste anymore!" WhiteMage replied, "Thanks, but, I can't. I'm not like you, BlackMage, and if you'll excuse me, I have some business to attend to." With that, WhiteMage left BlackMage. He shouted to her, "Don't leave me WhiteMage! You're all I've got!" Then, BlackMage began talking to himself again. He said, "You offered her a place in your new world order? You weakling!" He took his right hand and slapped himself across the face.

Fighter had reached the edge of the forest, hopefully clear from the hideous spiders forever. RedMage and Thief caught up soon after. Just then, WhiteMage showed up. She said, "Hello, Warriors. I ran into BlackMage just now, he was acting very strangely." RedMage then commented, "BlackMage? Yes. You should know, someone, or something, put him into a state of confusion, causing him to mistake us for monsters. Why, did he fire high-level magic at you?" WhiteMage answered, "No, but, we wasn't his usual sacreligious self." Fighter told, "Hey WhiteMage, you wanna know what I did earlier?" Thief then told, "While you're all catching up on old times, I'll go into the town and return these items." He walked off, bearing a devilish grin in doing so. He got into the town, but at the precise moment he did, a townswoman shouted, "Oh ye gods, it's that sexy hunk of Elf meat!" Thief was being chased by countless young girls, and he ran to the item shop. He got in just in time. The shopkeeper was there, as always. Thief said, "I'm a friend of the red wizard. I got your books and glasses right here." The shopkeeper breathed a sigh of relief, saying, "Oh thank goodness. No one's found out about my secret stash. Gotta keep that a secret from the misses after all." Thief then replied, "Of course, I'm not giving these back for free. Each of these books must be what, 5000 gil? Eight times five-thousand is 40,000 gil, and these glasses must be at least 10,000 gil, which brings us a total price of 50,000gil." The shopkeeper exclaimed, "50,000? That's robbery!" Thief whispered to himself, "I know." He then told the shopkeeper, "It wasn't easy finding these, so I expect a little payment in return." The shopkeeper reached for his gil, saying, "Alright, here's your filthy money. Now do us a favor and never show your face here again." Thief took the money, then said, "By the way, I'm gonna use your back exit." The shopkeeper asked, "What? Why?" Thief was gone before there was an answer. The Elf had managed to sneak out of town, avoiding the horny fangirls in the process.

"There he is, now." WhiteMage pointed out, referring to BlackMage. RedMage saw BlackMage slap himself. The crimson sorceror stated, "Oh, we shouldn't have. He's attacking himself now! How he's still alive is a miracle!" They approached the mad wizard. BlackMage said to himself, "Stop it! They're looking at us." He looked at the others, and told, "I came to realize something, It's a waste trying to kill you myself, so I'd rather wait and have someone else kill you all instead, except WhiteMage." Fighter then said, "Of course you wouldn't kill us, we're your friends!" BlackMage reached for his dagger, gripping the handle, and thought to himself, keep it up, Fighter. I dare you. Thief came back with his bounty. RedMage questioned, "So, what did we get for our FedEx quest?" Thief answered, "FedEx? I don't get it. Well, he gave us 50,000 gil, nothing more." RedMage exclaimed, "Outstanding! With that much money, we could buy enough Fenix Downs to survive a dungeon crawl, or maybe a-" RedMage continued rambling on. BlackMage didn't listen in. All he was thinking was, someday, someway, they will all perish. BY MY HANDS!

The end. For real this time.

dark butterfree

03-15-2006, 09:41 PM

*clapclapclapclapclap*
way to go, i_am_the_red_mage.
great work. seriously.
i still don't get the horny fangirls part, but it was very good!

Seran

03-15-2006, 10:02 PM

That was a very funny entry! ...Although, naturally, I found any part with the girls in it rather unusual. But that's just me being personal. Great job.

Robert Paulson

03-16-2006, 12:32 AM

I appreciate all the feedback I've been getting. Means a lot to see you actually reading one of my works. Now then, I'm gonna answer a few questions for all the many NPFers that have read my fanfics. (and by many, I mean four.)

In part 2 and 3, the idea of Thief having a large female fanbase came from the LOTR movies. You see, I had noticed just about every girl and woman who had seen these movies wouldn't stop obsessing over the Elf characters. Thief is an Elf, yet the ladies never seemed to be crazy for him in the actual comics, so in my interpretation of 8-bit Theater, Thief was a chick magnet, whether he wanted to be or not.

Also, in part 2, when RedMage asked Fighter about the inventor's guild's secretary, he was really asking if the secretary of the inventor's guild Fighter went to was the same secretary from Star Ocean: Till the End of Time. Anyone who's played far enough into that game will have caught the reference.

And lastly, those quotes that BlackMage was using in part 2 and 3? Let's just say those quotes were originally from a SquareSoft game released in the mid 1990's.

I don't plan on doing anymore 8-bit fanfics at the moment, so enjoy the fruits of my labor while you can.

dark butterfree

03-16-2006, 01:11 AM

well, now i know about all of that stuff i like your fanfic all the more.
i forgot to say in my origional post:
"yay! kefka reference!"

death_trooper

04-17-2006, 05:55 PM

I'm not in a story mood, but i'm gonna try
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++
Fighter stared into the sky, it was a peaceful day,to say the least and he hadn't had a rest since the quest started, he sighed silently and drifted into a peaceful slumber..more than can be said for red mage. His quill furiously scribbling on his character sheet, more than likely making up some skill that would aid them in thier journey and this obstacle.
" One thousand stabbings shall visit you if you cannot get past this damn gorge in at the most, ten minutes...." muttered black mage, angrily staring down the gorge of never ending upset, the bain of all who seeked to cross it.
"calm down black mage, i just need to improve my cement mixing skill and cross it with my gorge crossing skill and i can find a way to cross this gorge..."
"Wouldn't we need, you know, a gorge full of cement?" thief asked,sure of the answer.
"well, i suppose.." muttered red mage, "but we can get to that problem when we reach it, eh?"
Black mage stared at him with dark yellow eyes, even in the darkness of his face, any sane person could notice the rage building up inside him.
"You know...i COULD blast us across with a well-aimed hadoken..." said Black mage.
"That would kill us instantly!" yelled red mage.
"we'll get to THAT problem when we reach it, eh?" said black mage slyly.
Sensing the irony, red mage turned back to scribbling on his character sheet.
Fighter yawned boredly, his lust for shiny things depleted, and his senses dulled, simply watching the butterflies flutter by, he smiled slightly peacefully, these moments usually dulled out fast by black mage, he enjoyed the peace.
"Guys! my brilliant mind has come up with a great idea!" yelled red mage, excitedly.
"It better not have anything to do with a block of chesse and a pillow case..." muttered thief.
"......We'll keep this in reserve...."
Fighter suddenly shot up, eyes wide open, "guys, i'm having something, like..a thought with pictures..."
"An idea?" asked red mage.
"Yeah! yeah! yeah!, we go INTO the gorge and BM blows the place sky high!"
"Hey! for once, a good idea! I can destroy things, so it HAS to be good!" said black mage.
Red mage looked amazed at fighter, then realised he had been out thought and turned away to sulk, being out done by thief or black mage he could take, but fighter had trouble tying his shoe laces, as in he doesn't know what they are, and he chases his tail! He's not exactly brilliant...
"Only one way to find out i say, and it's better than staying here..so, how do we get down?" asked thief, he then looked at Black mage, who was smiling wickedly, as if he didn't know what Black mage was planning.
"I can get us down VERY quickly..." black mage said mysteriously.
"How BM, HOW!" asked fighter, oblivious to Black mages plot.
"well.....HAAAAAAA......"
"RUN!" yelled red mage, as he knew not even he could survive a full on blast of a hadoken.
"DOOOOOO....."
Fighter stood there, confused yet happy, STILL oblivious to what Black mage was obviously doing.
"Well, nice knowing your money fighter, by which i mean it was fun spending time with your money, i mean, god, i'm not good at this..." said thief.
"...KEN!!!!" yelled Black mage, finishing his deadly attack.
After a huge flash of light, there was pure silence, suddenly, a rumble appered underneath the ground....
"well, i always wished i'd die with white mage in my room, but at least i had fun with my life..." said Black mage, seemingly knowing more than he was letting on.
the ground gave way, and the group fell into the gorge.....
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++
Please give reviews, this is my first try at theis sort of thing...:S

happy_turtle

04-21-2006, 08:56 PM

OK...after reading all these fanfics I can say without a doubt that my IQ is now lower...

Martamania

05-06-2006, 05:52 PM

If you haven't read the Wotch, you need to before you read this. Click on the picture in the top-left and read from there. (http://thewotch.com)

I could use some suggestions on this before I go on so... yeah. I know crossovers aren't usually popular, but I felt the need to give this a shot. Here are the plots that will be going on:

Xaos and Black Mage argue over who is the more evil of the two.

White Mage finds herself being followed by Jason (she IS a redhead, after all).

Red Mage accidently activates Evan's amulet, turning himself into Debora (or Debbie as she's referred to in this instance) and Evan into Lilly.

Fighter finds himself in Cassie's basement, and naturally falls for her because fighters and goths were made for each other or something.

Thief, Anne, and Robin actually try to solve the problem (caused by Sarda, of course) while everyone else is screwing around.

A few other characters from both stories will pop-up, but that's pretty much it as far as the important stuff.

8-Bit Wotch

Prologue

The universe is a very fragile thing that can be altered forever with the slightest little force, be it a paradox, interference in the time stream, or, in this particular case, a wizard.
-------------------------

The Light Warriors walk through the deadly forests of the feared throughout all the world region that happens to be known as the Deadly Forests.

“You ever get the feeling that everything that happens happens to hurt you?” Black Mage asks his three cohorts as they travel through the wood-covered environment.

“I get the impression that everything happens happens so that I walk out richer no matter what the situation. And to prove elves are superior to all the other races combined three-times-over,” Thief, an elvish prince and, true to his name, master con-artist replies with his usual elven bias.

“Why do we even bother talking to each other if we all hate each other anyway?” Red Mage, the so-called strategist of the group, wonders his way into the conversation.

“Finally a rare dose of something resembling being close to sensible out of Red Mage,” Black Mage mumbles.

“You guys are the best friends a guy could have!” Fighter exclaims, drawing a sigh from his three companions. Fighter is, simply put, the meat shield of the group.

“You get the feeling we’re about to be pulled into some crazy adventure in another dimension?” Red Mage asks the other three, drawing a blank stare.

“What makes you say-“ but Thief cuts off upon seeing Red Mage pointing toward a large wormhole of sorts that, immediately upon capturing the attention of the so-called heroes, pulls them into it.
-------------------------

Meanwhile, in another, darker dimension... (but considering guys like Sarda and Forest Imps are running around, not by much)

“Ugh... am I dead?” Black Mage asks hopefully as he pulls himself off the ground, coming face to face with a large knight-looking man, who in all truth looks somewhat like Garland.

“State your name or relinquish your mind and soul to my Sword of Shadows,” the man snarls while staring down at Black Mage.

“Trust me, I never did have a soul, and after years of being around Fighter I question if I have a mind either,” Black Mage replies sarcastically to the man. “Either way, I’m Black Mage. Destroyer of civilizations, sacrificer of children, yadayadayada.”

“I am the great and powerful evil Lord Xaos. You are in my territory now, and you will do as I say when I give the command.”

“Big bad evil Chaos, huh?” Black Mage taunts. “If you’re so evil, tell me an evil thing you’ve ever done.”

“I steal the hearts and souls of people, making them into my Fallen minions.”

“That it? I’ve orphaned a kid. Three times.”
-------------------------

Meanwhile, in a small town...

“How did I even get involved in this story?” White Mage breaks the fourth wall as she wanders through the streets of Tandy Gardens, receiving not-so-weird glances due to the ever-present effects of Sunnydale Syndrome.

death_trooper

05-21-2006, 09:16 AM

part 2
if you don't like it, please say, need the critiscisum :D
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thief groaned and sat up, his head filled with thoughts, but mostly if his money was ok, his eyes adjusted to the darkness of the gorge and he looked around, he couldn't see any of his idiots...i mean friends, but he saw his money bag, he gave a huge sigh of relief and looked inside, and to his horror, it was empty! Thief gave a paniced gasp and looked around, his mind rishing with thoughts of his money being spent by some offish amatuer thief, he got up and ran into a pathway.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the gorge, red mage was still wincing from the pain of the fall, he would have to find some way to minus a lesser skill and improve his vunribility, he stood up and looked around, a quick fire spell lit the area up, he saw fighter sitting in a courner, scared witless.
"whats up fighter?"
"D-d-dark.."
"Don't tell me your afraid of the dark.."
He stood fighter up adn they both walked of, Red mages low armour ability made it impossible for him to take many hits, but a good meat shield like fighter...

Black mage smiled, as he predicted, he was alone, now if he found a way out first, he could be free of the imbeciles, AND having took thiefs money during the fray on the top, he had no worries, now, he had to find a way out, Black mage was never good at scouting, he just let fighter run in front and get hit, so he took careful steps, entering a cavern, he saw a flash of light.
"That was easy..." he thouhght to himself, and walked into the light.
He was in an open topped part of the gorge, the area was covered in light, it was almost a perfect circle.
"Huh, TOO easy..shoulda known.."muttered black mage.
"THERE YOU ARE!" yelled a familier voice.
Black mage gulped, and turned around..

"Are we there yet? are we there yet? are we there yet? are we there yet? are we there yet? are we there yet? are we the.."
"NO FIGHTER!" yelled red mage, cursing the gods that HE was stuck with fighter. Red mage was an expert map artist, and was making a perfect map of the surrondings,when they found black mage and thief, they could easily get out, one thing he couldn't do was fight though, using his fire spells continusly was the only thing he could do with his mana at this situation, he couldnt afford to us any for anything else, fighter was his only hope, as they made thier way, fighter couldn't help thinking they were being watched...

Black mage turned around, and saw thief glaring at him,no, not at him, at his pocket, thief KNEW he had his money.
"give it back BM.." thief said
"Come and get it." Black mage answered, wishing he was as confident as he sounded.
"BM, we both know i could kick your butt before it touched the ground.
"Prove it"
Thief hesitated for one second, then ran at Black mage deadly fast, black mage dodged to the right, thief went skidding past, he turned round and got a blast of fire, he shook it off, and ran at black mage, hitting him in the stoumch, Blakc mage groaned and looked up, to see thief running at him again, blakc mage countered with a powerful thunderbolt, sending thief flying, thief was gone when the dust cleared, black mage looked round, not noticing the dark figure behind him...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Iyeru

06-05-2006, 08:16 PM

Sometimes it bugs me to give out links to my comics... or whatever they are.

Go here for the whole list (http://iyeru42.zero-outpost.com/board/index.php?showtopic=11) whilist you watch the Comic #006 Preview (http://iyeru42.zero-outpost.com/images/comic/preview006.html) and see my mad Flash skills. YES, I know that the stopAllSounds(); function ain't at the beginning... but it CBF so meh.

Loyal

06-17-2006, 12:27 AM

In response to the latest comic... (http://www.nuklearpower.com/daily.php?date=060617)

-King Steve: Left-hand-man Gary! Fetch me my shoes!
-LHMGary: Your new "Face" shoes, your highness?
-Steve: Yes! They're so very comfortable!
-Gary: ...Highness, about those shoes...
-Steve: Yes, Gary, I know. They're made from fresh faces daily!
-Gary: Yes, but they're staring at me when I go to fetch them...
-Steve: What do you think makes them so comfortable, then, Gary? Hmm?
-Gary: ...I regret ever questioning your logic, highness.

If you can't guess the inspiring comic, you haven't been paying attention to the comic enough. :p

Theif

07-08-2006, 10:54 PM

another scam by Thief:

thief: hey fighter
fighter: what?
thief: o nothing i just wanted to show you this... SWORD (shing sparkle sparkle) (actully it's just a chrome piece of wood in the shape of a sword) but you hate those things don't you?
fighter: no i love swords!
thief: well... would you like to have it?
fighter: please!
thief: alright... but! a-
:rmage: dun dun duun!
thief: ooookay? at the cost of all your swords
fighter: why?
thief: cuz this sword is... ummm... special ya ya it's special
fighter: how?
thief: it uhhhhh... has 50,000 attack and umm... it makes you invincible
fighter: o great now i don't have to carry this armoire around anymore YOU GOT A DEAL!
:thief: haha sucker :fighter: haha sucker

Theif

07-08-2006, 11:05 PM

how do i color my text?

:thief: :thief: :thief: :thief: the elves are coming! the elves are coming! run to the hills with your swords no matter how shiney!

Meister

07-09-2006, 04:03 AM

Look here (http://forum.nuklearpower.com/misc.php?do=bbcode), and also don't double post since that's against the rules. You explicitly accepted them not too long ago, so it's in your best interest to have read them. Besides, questions like that shouldn't be asked just in the nest best thread. You get the idea.

Evil duck

07-20-2006, 10:21 AM

:rmage: : LYK OMG CRACKERZZZ!!!!!11111one one one

:fighter: : *sigh* Why is it I am always left with these Moronic twits?

:bmage: : YAY! i have a yellow hat and no friends!

fighter : I suppose you have to be pragmatic in these situations....

:thief: : look I brought a sword Fighter!

fighter : ERGHH! keept those fuggin things away from me, I hate swords, I would much rather Talk to monsters so they may express there feelings, rather then just beat the living crud out of them!

excelfanboy

08-05-2006, 10:12 PM

Okay this iis more of a prediction of a potential ending from what I have gathered from the comic. From what I have heard there are forces at work! (As Darko was saying when giving black mage blue magic) And they are trying to undermine him... like Swordopolis and Fighter! So then you also look back at when they were flying the deathtrap with black mage still stuck on it and the look into the future. There it clearly shows fighters colored words and Hell Black Mage's colored words. Which shows that somehow Black MAge had gained unbelievably more power, and there conversation suggests that they are about to enter into a to the death duel! So it will end how it started with Black Mage and Fighter but they are turned against each other like how the forces of good and evil are supposed to.

That's how I roll anyway

Derek

08-20-2006, 07:11 PM

fighter: Hey guys, you'll never guess what Im thinking about!

bmage: Is it nothing? because thats what you're best at.

fighter: Nope guess again!

thief: uhh let me guess, is it..... swords?

fighter: Of course not! uhh wait did you say swords?

thinking

bmage: Uhh this constant foolishness is bound to drive my dark sadistic soul
out of the darkest corners of my mind and explode in a unmercifull agonizing plague.
talking

thief: you haven't spoken In a while Red Mage is something on your mind?

rmage: Actually yes. It seems our struggle to save the world has been quite unsucsesful. Its as if our exsistance is just used to portray entertainment to those who laugh at our pitiful attempt to rid the world of evil.

bmage: Red mage.... That must be the stupidest thing Ive ever heard. Fighter makes more sence than you!

fighter: Thats my name! Don't wear it out!

bmage: Shut up foo!

thief: I think BM's right.

bmage: Of course Im right! The only reason we can't save the world is because you Idiots keep screwing off!

fighter: Maybe If you guy's were half the warrior I was we would save the world times two right now!

rmage: Wait a minute. "save the world times two?

fighter: yeah! We would've saved Two Worlds, about Two Times!

bmage: I take it back, "Thats the stupidest" thing Ive ever heard.

thief: Maybe it's because there aren't enough of us.

rmage: But the rules say we can only have "4 warriors of Light"

fighter: Yeah and I count as 4 light warriors myself! We're allready breaking the rules!

thief: Well maybe we could change the rules.

rmage: But were would we find warriors capable of being light warriors Such as us?

bmage: Besides for me, you guy's can find your equals in a day care.

fighter: Yes, my life long rival Cathy Perkins and I met in such a facility. She stole my toy charriet, then pulled on my hair!

rmage: Well there's alway's white mage.

fighter: What about Jimmy Cafka? I and Jimmy used to take on Cathy Perkins together
bmage: Will you shut up? Ever?

fighter: I think you're just jelous. Don't worry BM, you're still my best friend!

bmage: Urge to kill rising.... Can't.. Control it!

thief: I think were good enough with 4 light warriors, wo theres no need to bring in White Mage. And since Im the leader it's official.

Thinking

bmage: Lets see, Ill cast a small posion in thief's eyes rendering him blind.
Next Ill use an Ice spell to freeze red mages lungs, and crush them under my mighty boot. than I'll cut open thief's spine and pluck the bones right out, paralizing him. Then I shall HADOKEN the crap out of fighter.

The End?

blackwaltzomega

10-20-2006, 05:00 PM

Black Mage stood atop a hill. His parachute pants and cape ruffled in a slight, but very dramatic breeze. Black Mage turned around after a moment, seeing one of his "friends" Red Mage, wearing some sort of ridiculous-looking dark glasses.

"What do you want?" He said, rolling his glowing yellow eyes. Knowing Red Mage, it was probably so stupid he shouldn't bother guessing.

"I just found these Glasses of True Sanity! They allow me to automatically shield myself from one mind-shattering encounter per day. So I need to test them now...BM, could you remove your hat for a second?"

Black Mage was silent for a moment, but his malicious eyes danced in glee at the chance to bump off one of his party members already.

"OK. You asked for it..." BM hadn't removed his hat since the class change. He wondered if his face looked any different.

The hat came off.

The sun abruptly snuffed itself out, and the sky turned blood red. Dead birds and insects rained from the sky as the vegetation within a 100 mile radius turned black with corruption and died. Various skeletons dug themselves out of the ground, writhed and danced in agony, and turned to ashes. The lenses on RM's sunglasses cracked. Somewhere in the distance, Tonberries poked their heads out of the caves they lived in, looking intently at the spot BM stood upon.

BM replaced his hat, and RM's glasses fell off.

"Oh." RM said weakly, his eye twitching once.

"Good news, the glasses work." BM said. He began to walk away.

"How did you make those--" RM began.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"And that 4th--"

"Genetics."

"Why was that thing coming out of your--"

"I blame my dad."

"At least explain the EYEBROWS..."

"You don't want to know."

"Why does your hat smell like Tonberry?"

"I repeat: You don't want to know."

"...How did your hair--"

"DROP IT, RM."

Karenaide

10-29-2006, 04:56 PM

The wind blew gently in the breeze, carrying with it the scent of wildflowers. Black Mage stood upon a hilltop, his long cape rippling gently in the breeze. Looking out unto most of the world, he sighed, wondering about his past. He wondered about his fate, he wondered about everything that had happened, but most of all, he wondered about himself. His life was not a happy tale, but listen close, and you shall hear it.

Black Mage was born in Melmond, and he hated everything about it. His parents were both Black Mages, explaining his visage and lust for blood. But this story is of his life, not his family. So, at the age of fourteen, he was sent to the Academy of the Apocalypse, where he was forced to learn the powers of hatred and destruction. During these gruesome times, he held out a faint glimmer of hope, like a single strand of spider silk, wet with dew, shining in the early hours of the morning. At long last, his teachings grew too much to resist, and the dew dragged down the spider web, soaking it and never letting go.

When Black Mage was expelled, he was not grateful, but positively wrathful! His fists clenched, he ground his teeth, and, before the whole school, he removed his hat, sun shining upon his bleached face for the first time. For your sakes, I will tell you of his visage:
he looked just like a normal person. Surprised? Don't be. Black Mages were cursed by their nemesis, the White Mages, long ago, and until they learned every dark art they could, their faces remained cursed. Each one had a different curse upon them, and when their faces were revealed, the curse escaped, feasting upon the innocent. As it went, Black Mage's face was snow white, from having never seen the sun. His hair was purple and hung down to his shoulders. He had a scar that ran from his chin all the way up to his right ear, and over to his left temple. As his fellow scholars saw his face, they turned to stone, never to move again, lest the curse be lifted. And naturally, the only ones who could reverse this gruesome affliction were the ones that had delivered it...

Black Mage took a deep breath as tears welled in his eyes, clouding his vision and smearing the landscape. Tears, he thought to himself. It has been so long... He remembered FIghter, as they met after both being expelled. He had bumped into him accidentally, but Fighter assumed them to be 'Best Friends Forever'. Yeah, right! Black Mage swept off his hat and wiped his brow, for the day was hot and the sun was high. His life explained so much... yet for knowledge it gave little.

He remembered when the Light Warriors first went to Dwarfland, and the first town they burned. He remembered the screams... and the blood-oh! The blood! One bard was in the tavern, and Black Mage went alone. He heard the Bard's song, and he killed him for it. But in the end, he killed him out of amazement and shock. The dwarves still sung that song as they built, ever building, never resting. It went:

"T'was a lovely day for mining, all sunny, clear and warm!
But then we saw the light, and it burned like did my faaaaaarm!
...And wreathed in flames did they set down upon me,
Burning and maiming all that they could see.
Since that day,not one of
us has spoken.
We live in fear,
that again we will hear,
The voice, which shouts:
HADOKEN!!!!!"

Black Mage pulled the parchment which the poem was written on out of his pocket, and his darker side took over. He still had a sliver of sanity, and his incessant babbling was him trying to overthrow his 'Dark Side'. When he absorbed his 'Hell King's' power in the Castle of Ordeals,he didn' get it all.

Fighter put down the parchment and stared at Thief and Red Mage.
"Now we know,"

To Be Continued...

Dragonsbane

11-03-2006, 12:32 PM

...not responding to anyone I've seen in here, yet, but PLEASE tell me there IS a rule against creepy fan fic-shun?

Because I swear, bishonen wingfic Fighter/Giant tentacle yaoi will incur my wrath.

Karenaide

11-14-2006, 09:58 AM

"There. Happy now?" Black Mage scowled and snatched back the paper from Fighter, tucking it in his robes before turning to Red Mage.
"Now it's your turn," he sat down. RM took out a peice of parchment and frowned.
"Drat! I don't have a 'Storytelling' skill!" All it took was a look from BM for him to shut up and hand them another piece of parchment. Thief began to read:

"I was born in Corneria, of all places. My father hated me. I ran away. I met these three idiots. Yo. I rule."

"That's it?" Asked Thief quizically.
"Well, yeah. It really is," Red Mage answered sheepishly.
"Why, Red Mage? Why do you hate your eyes so much? Is seeing so very, very bad?" Black Mage wore a demonic grin, and his eyes showed it.
Red Mage sighed and began the true tale of his life:

"I was born in Corneria, into a family of farmers. We farmed corn, naturally. We were minor workers in the kingdom, barely worthy of notice if we hadn't found that gold mine under the fields of corn. But our riches and fame soon changed due to..." Red Mage stopped, clutching his head. "I-I don't remember... It involves an elf...and-"
"Right!" Thief grinned nervously and took RM by the shoulders. "That's okay, get some rest, you'll need it." He seemed extremely nervous about where this story was heading, as it obviously was directly related to him. Black Mage frowned, his expression unrecognizable due to the shadows that covered his face. Fighter just blinked and began rambling on incessantly.
"I once tripped on a rock, and I scraped my knee, and it bled a little, and I still have the scars. Then I ate a sandwich and-"
"Okay, Fighter. Just for that, you go last,"
"Awwww... I always go last!"

:rmage:In Progress. I'm faking that I know how to make a story! Convincing, huh?:rmage:

MizukoMidori

11-25-2006, 06:21 AM

Title: That Was Funny, Wasn't It?
Author: Rachel
Based off of strip 434: "Wouldn't You Like To Know"
Notes: This was always my favorite 8-Bit strip and this is kind of how I always pictured this scene going.

That Was Funny, Wasn't It?
By Rachel

There was blood everywhere. It was all over the floor, the wallls, him even. But that was the way Black Mage liked it. He was evil, and he enjoyed the carnage. The bodies that littered the carpet and stone of Corneria's castle, those were his doing. He told them all he would kill them some day. They never listened. Yet, he didn't feel as satisfied as should, as he thought he would. Something wasn't quite right.

He looked at Fighter, the only one still alive. The fiery haired warrior was strangely calm for the events that had just taken place. All of his friends murdered in cold blood by his supposed best friend. Fighter just gazed back at him his usually unintelligent eyes strangely sharp. Black Mage wouldn't admit it to anyone, let alone himself, but it would be safe to say that Fighter knew him better than anyone ever had. He was the only one who ever tried.

Black Mage heaved a sigh as his gaze swept over the bodies once more. "You know... When I look back at my life, I can't help but see an inevitable chain of events."

Fighter scoffed, "That's ridiculous."

The murderous magician raised an eyebrow at his companion as he plucked a knife out of the body of White Mage. "Do you believe there could have been any other outcome than this?" He gestured with the knife idly indicating the room. White Mage at his feet, King Steve was slaughtered in his throne his daughter draped across him, Thief was some ways behind him, and Red Mage was at Fighter's feet.

"That's not how it works." Fighter shook his head, still disturbingly calm, "There is no grand story to History. Things just happen. It's the act of looking back on it that interposes a sense of narrative." Black Mage hadn't even realized the warrior even knew words like 'interposes' and 'narrative'.

Fighter was wrong however. The universe worked in a certain way, everything was preordained. Or else how could you have things like prophecies? The Light Warriors wouldn't have been, if it weren't for History being set. That was how it worked, that was how it was.

"And yet, here we are just as we were always going to be!" He flung a hand out to gesture to the room again, "Doesn't that drive you mad? Don't you hate yourself for it? For never having seen it coming until now? Every little thing is so painfully obvious now, isn't it? Now that it's too late you have all the answers, don't you?" He was ranting, almost having lost his temper. He had stalked up to this man who called him friend. There was desperation in his tone.

Fighter locked eyes with him and held his gaze. "It's not too late." He reached out a hand to put it on Black Mage's shoulder, but the mage turned away.

"It is for some people."

"Are you trying to goad me?" There was a little bit of the normal Fighter. He sounded more hurt than angry. Fighter was rarely angry, and too easily hurt.

Black Mage shook his head. Fighter was an amazing person. It was too bad he had gotten involved.

"You know it's going to end here." he said, almost sadly.

When he chanced a glance at Fighter the swordsman was smiling. "Just like it was always going to, right?"

Black Mage's own mouth quirked into a bit of a smirk. He shifted his grip on the knife in his hand and heard his friend raise his sword off the ground.

"You're catching on."

mammothtank

11-25-2006, 12:11 PM

I do believe Mizuko's post has inspired me. I too have a theory about episode 434, and though my story is written in a similar vein, it is quite different. *begins typing*
(after typing) Geez, this has to be my longest post ever.

"Bad Ending?"

The sky, still full of magical energy from the climactic battle, glowed an eerie red, obscured here and there by black clouds. The ground for miles in every direction was barren and cracked, and any life within that radius had been extinguished some time ago. There were, however, five figures near the center of this blotch of destruction, four of which were prone. The fifth, a woman in robes that once shone a beautiful white but were now torn and stained with dirt and blood, knelt beside her fallen foe. This foe, though his dark face and glowing eyes failed to display it, struggled to maintain an even expression. His clothing, like the woman's, was ripped and stained where it used to symbolically boast his awesome might. His body, however, was far more broken than hers. The woman kneeling over him shed a single tear, which sparkled unnecessarily as it fell to the ground. She tightly held his hand in hers, but his grip seemed to be weakening.

The soon-to-be-dead man sighed. "When I look back at my life, I can't help but see an inevitable chain of events." Considering the woman's history, he would have expected her to agree, but he knew that his actions had quite changed her opinion on the matter.

Proving this point, her response was brief: "That's ridiculous."

He rolled his creepy yellow eyes. "Do you truly believe there could have been any other outcome than this?"

It was the woman's turn to sigh. "If you have taught me but one thing, it is that that's not how it works." She took a breath before continuing. "There is no grand story to history. Things just happen; it's the act of looking back on past events that interposes a sense of narrative."

Though the irony of this conversation was beginning to come to light, they pressed onward. "And yet..." The need to cough interrupted his thought. "...here we are, just as we were always going to be. Doesn't that drive you mad?" He punctuated this question with a sneer, which would have been invisible had his teeth not glowed white just then for no known reason. "Don't you hate yourself for it? For never having seen it coming until now?" He spoke with a flourish that was almost unlike him. "Every little thing is so painfully obvious now, isn't it? You know, hindsight and all that? Now that it's too late, you have all the answers, don't you?"

Quite taken aback, the woman found the right words escaping her. "It's not too late," was all she could say.

The glowing eyes softened. "It is for some people."

Looking straight into those eyes, she responded, "Are you trying to goad me?"

"Regardless, you know it's going to end here." The eyes suddenly stopped glowing, as their owner had closed them.

The woman held back her tears. "Just as it was always going to, right?"

One of the glowing eyes put in its final appearance as the man said, "You're catching on." As he exhaled, she felt his hand become limp.

All rational thought left her. She could think of nothing to do but flop down in the dust and cry. The four prone, unmoving figures around her had once been mighty warriors prophesized to save the world from a great evil. They now lay dead before her, three killed at the hands of the fourth, and the fourth by her own. There was now no one left to rescue the world from its imminent peril. Find new warriors? Impossible. Undertake the task herself? She couldn't, for she knew she lacked the wisdom and experience. There was nothing to do but wait as the end drew inexorably nearer...

Presently, she heard a sound. She held her breath and listened intently, and was rewarded when she heard it again: a soft moan, coming from close by. She quickly climbed to her feet, daring to hope -

MizukoMidori

11-25-2006, 05:25 PM

I like your take on it too. If I could imagine anyone else that Black Mage would be talking to, it would be White Mage. I also like how you added in things here and there.

Once upon a time the story in my head had been longer and more drawn out, explaining why it was that BM killed everyone. But when I started writing that last night, I thought that if I'd done that, I might ruin the effect of what I had, so I left it at just that.

I love that scene though. And your version was also a good read. ^^

C War

12-05-2006, 03:59 AM

This is my play on an ending for the series.

White Mage is sitting at the volcano, trying once again to revive Black Belt.
I can do this! I am a White Mage! I'm sure I have all the pieces this time....LIFE!
Black Belt stands up, and looks down at her.
Why? Why did you bring me back? The afterlife was wonderful! Now, if you'll excuse me....He then jumped into the lava of the volcano.
No! I, I can't belive it! I, I truly have failed. I couldn't revive him again, and now his body is gone! Obviously part of his brain was lost in the process.... I should have cast Auto-Life on him so long ago, preventing his death. I, I can't....
As the pain settled into place, everything that she was suddenly shattered. Memories flooded through her in an instant. Failing exams in school. The mean girls who always talked bad about her, and not just behind her back. Her name written on the bathroom wall. Every year. Being mocked by students who were younger than her and still graduated ahead of her. Having to cheat on her fifth attempt at the final exams to finally pass. Her struggles for acceptance in the Order. Being mocked again by her peers. Her name being carved on the bathroom wall. It was still there, she suspected.
Her memories then moved on to her adventures with the Light Warriors. They had finally disbanded last week, after killing Sarda for trying to take over the world with the orbs he'd had them retrieve. Thief got so fed up with the group that he didn't care about their money anymore, and had officially dissolved the group. She had met each of them once since. Thief was engaged to Sara after he assassinated her father. She was already slated for a genetic surgery to turn her into an elf. Fighter had somehow managed to meet up with a valkyrie, who loved swords as much as he did and had a similar mental capacity. When she had left them they were still deep in 'conversation'.
I like swords.
I like swords.
I like swords.
I like swords.
White Mage could tell that they were made for each other. Red Mage had joined up with Ranger and his group, and had told her that he was finally gaining the experience that he'd always wanted. Then there was Black Mage...
Her mind was filled with images of black mage, tendrills of him seeping through. He was always so dirty, and yet when it came down to it, he really didn't smell any worse than most things in the world, he just had a lot of bad smells stacked up on one another. One image stayed in the forefront of her mind. A letter that he wrote to her, so long ago. One paragraph of it stood out in her mind.
And what I keep trying to say is that none of this was your fault. You could not have known what would happen. And, who knows, maybe it was fate that Black Belt died. Just because something hurts doesn't mean it's not supposed to be that way.
Everything clicked back into place. She finally realized that the only person who had ever really cared about her in any way was Black Mage. Black Belt had never really been much of a friend, but a guardian, and he had died satisfied with his service in that role. Black Mage, though, looked at her as a woman, one that he loved, in some sense at least. She let her long suppressed feelings and her dark training rise to the surface as she threw off what she once was, discarded her allegiance to the Order that had never given her anything but suffering and pain. A new flame gleamed behind her eyes as she set out in search of Black Mage. She had last seen him headed off towards dwarfland to create more chaos there, so she decided that she would go there first.
* * * *
Two days later, she came to the border of dwarfland, and saw that Black Mage was definately in the region. Flames burned in his wake, but for once in her life she didn't care about the victims or about healing. She followed the trail of burning towns to where the last dwarven stronghold lay. She waited, and then saw a burst of blue-white flames engulf it. She had found him. She ran to where the beam had come from, and saw Black Mage standing there laughing.
Ah, the burning! I love it so!
The flames are beautiful, aren't they?
The fires dance before me, in tune with the screams...Wait, White Mage? And you said...
Come with me, little man, I have something to show you.
Um, okay, I guess, sexy lady.
White Mage turned to him. Mute! I'd rather avoid the lewd comments for now. Save it for when it's right.
Black Mage gave her a very confused look as she led him over the ridge to where a small dwarven villiage that he'd missed was nestled.
Now, watch closely. HADOKEN! She blasted the town with the blue-white flames, leaving only a crater behind. Black Mage stared at her wide eyed.
Now, I think that those ashes will be the perfect place. Let's go. Oh, yes, Esuna!
Black Mage was so stunned that for a moment he still couldn't speak. Are, are you serious? I'm dreaming, right?
No, my love, this is all very real. I have finally realized where I should have been this whole time. In your arms, or your bed. I was so useless as a white mage, I chose the wrong path so long ago. I guess that I really don't need these anymore. She threw off her white robe, letting it fall to the ground. Fira! the robe caught fire, burning the last remnant of her past.
Black Mage stared at her in her underwear, absolutely speachless. His dreams for so long were about to finally be realized. Then what are we standing here for, my dear? Let's go! Together they dash down the mountain to where the ashes of the destroyed town are. He lays aside his own clothes, but hesitates when it comes to the hat. What would happen if..?
I'm ready, but there's no way that we can do this if you wear that silly hat. She stood up and grabbed for it.
No, wait, but....He couldn't resist as she snatched it off of his head.
See, no problem.
But, but the....the maddness, the...
Really, my dear, did you think that your curse or whatever would be able to faze me? My white magic is able to counter whatever that is supposed to do, and I find it fitting, personally. Now, are you ready?
Black Mage finally found his tounge again.Oh yeah, baby, let's rock! He jumped on top of her, and a new relationship began between them.
* * the next morning * *
Ah, that was wonderful!
You're telling me! I have some questions for you, though.
Go ahead.
Ok, how did you gain the ability to use the Hadoken?
On the way here. You told me once about how you gained it, and it wasn't hard to reproduce that simple sacrifice. Heh, with magic that dark, I'm really not a white mage anymore. technically I guess I'm a red Mage.
Why is it a Red Mage, anyways? Shouldn't it be like a Gray Mage?
Probably. Heh, since we're going to decimate the world together anyways, we can call it whatever we want. I am now a gray Mage. I guess that these charred items of clothing would make a suitible uniform for me. She picked through the ashes until she found a blanket that had somehow survived merely singed, and she wrapped it around herself as her new robe.
Wait, did you say what I think you said?
Oh yes, I did. We can burn the world in our wake, my love. Together. She kissed him soundly.
Hey guys, look who I found!
Crap, it's Red Mage. Sure enough, Red Mage emerged from the foliage.
Hey, BM, long time no see.
It's been two days.
I've missed you old pal. hey, who's the lady? You take some lessons and abduct her?
Hardly!
White Mage, is that you? What happened? Ranger, Berserker, Rogue, and Cleric were just behind Red Mage.
Not anymore, I'm not. Time for you bastards to say goodbye! She pulled out her hammer and started to smack the interlopers. They all flew off into the distance, except for Cleric whom she flattened into the ground.
Ah, the blood is quite satisfying, really. Ooh, Berserker dropped his axe! I can really make the blood spurt with this baby!
Um, where do you keep that?
It's called Hammerspace, my dear. Now let's get going. We're not going to burn the world to ash just standing here. She tucked the hammer and axe back into hammerspace, and then hand in hand they walked off to cause mass devastation.
* * Two weeks later * *
--the journal of fighter--

Ah, life is good. Valkyrie has agreed to be my wife, and we will marry tonight. Before Black Mage and Gray Mage (where did she come from? She reminds me of White Mage, who I haven't seen for a long time) kill the priest who will do the ceremony.
There are lots of fires lately, burning a lot. And there's a lot less people and cities around, too. Oh yeah, I just remembered! I get to rule part of the world! It's a small part, though, just some islands in the middle of the ocean. But me and Valkyrie will rule the Sword Islands together. (I came up with the name!) She has been very fun to be with. She has helped me to perfect my Sword-chuck designs, and we now both have some. We went with Black Mage and Gray Mage yesterday to go and kill some stuff. Black Mage used his knife a lot, and Gray Mage used her axe (the axe makes me think of that dwarf guy that we met) and me and Valkyrie used our sword-chucks, and there was blood everywhere, and we won!
Thief and Sara are now ruling a combined kingdom, and the elves are mining in Corneria for the resources that are actually there, instead of the ones that aren't that Sara's daddy was looking for. (She told me that herself, and I actually remembered!) Together they are doing something called 'political intrigue' (thief told me that one) and are having a lot of money. Red Mage has become their errand boy, (Sara named him that) and he gets to go on all of the 'side quests' that the two of them come up with. He's very happy.
I guess that we all got to be happy in the end. Go Light Warriors! Yaay! Oh, Valkyrie says it's time for the wedding. bye!

---The End---

So, what do you think? (BM was always my favorite character, so I wanted him to get what he wanted in the end. And really, causing the world to writhe in rebirth could conceivably be considered "saving" it.

Karenaide

12-19-2006, 04:12 PM

Because technically FanFiction is when you make your own story in the world or role of the thing you are a fan of, and I have a cool Final Fantasy 1 FanFic I would like to share.

The_Editable_Wiki

12-28-2006, 07:03 AM

Here's something I'd like to write:

What happened during those Twenty minuetes of Hell...
-----
"I have entire legions of hell at my command," roared the abomination which ruled Hell with an iorn fist. The grotesque form of the creature is too complex to describe in words, so we shall carry on, and get on with the plot.

Blackmage cried, "Enjoy it while you can, skippy." He smiled, and waited for a response from the giant demon, who power most likely exceeds anything on that particular realm of existance and could crush Black Mage instantaenously had flesh and bone with his left thumb.

Black Mage's plan formed in mere seconds in his head, his eyes danced with fire and hate, moreso than usual. He was not going to be punished for his sins, nor intended to..ever. There was only one way how.

"Eh? What have ye?" The demon knew that the little man will try to ursup the entire kingdom of Hell, if you could call it that. The field of burning corpses dancing in the fire of a thousand suns with rampant starvation among the paupers was hardly a kingdom, but they did have the paperwork to prove it was perfectly legimate....

"Only the unbounded power that lie at my fingetips. The limitless energy that inhabits my form, the strength of a lifetime's training. The sheer destructive capacity that is an endless void yawning in my mind, and the lust for power and rule over the universe." Black Mage began to rant. This could take some time, and (as we have all seen) does not end pretty."If could simply Hadoken you to dust, and dance over what was left like a happy little schoolboy, or freeze you to absoluete zero, causing the bonds that hold your very atoms to stop moving and break apart, taking you with them. Or I could cast Doom on you and mess with your head while your destruction will approach with every move you make. Why, the sheer amount of possibilities that I could devastate your worthless hides is incalculable, and indeed pointless to contemplate, for that would only prolong my rulership of Hell!" Black Mage was goin somewhat hysterical now. His eyes danced with a dreamy sort of fashion,his voice cracking, and the gestures he had more complex and malicious. "The possibilities are endless", he told himeslf.

"You will die a horrible and stabbity related death, fiend!" cried Black Mage, his poor attempt for a clever battle cry.Knife withdrawn, and the the speed Black Belt would have been proud of had he been there, leapt at the demon and stabbed him brutally to death.

This went on for some time, until about the *SNAP* of the bloody pulp of a creature's spinal cord snapped in half and paralyzed the Overlord's body."No use stabbing a dead demon. That be stupider than bothering to kill forest imps," Black Mage said. He moved on to conquer the land of brimstone and fire, lost in his thoughts of conquest and power...

The hell Overlord lie in a mumbled heap."Ugh...spine broken....dignity shattered...lack of conciousness..immenient...ability to speak coherently..passing..argh."The demon passed out,albeit it dramatically, unable to relize he had had mythical powers to dispose of dissenters such as Black Mage and make Hell miserable again for everyone but him, and heal himself to full HP. But he forgot, and thus failed to change the course of history for better or for worse, and lost the respect of ex-minions everywhere.

"Hm, I wonder how long it will take to conquer Hell," thought black mage aloud. He strode along the burning ground of Hell unscathed and not charboiled, and thought what he should do the the minions of pestilence, poverty,unrest, death, and various amounts of doom. He wizard's hat was almost blown off in a breeze of intense heat, and he attempted to keep it on, for the sake of the passerby's sanity, should he happen to see his face. He did no wat to deal with that again. Consquently, he fell and broke his spine.

"URGH! THE UNRELENTING IRONY! Damn you, ruler of Hell! I shall now die a horrible and burning death in lava and blood and gore. Damn you!" He spasmed, had a seizure, and died. But only figurtively.

Black Mage sat up straight after a moment. He was already dead. He can't die AGAIN. That'd be redundant. He stood up, brushed himself off, and made sure no one was looking. Their future ruler can't be made a fool of. He soon enountered the only building the entire citezenryship of Hell lived in for all of eternity. He walked in.

The Tower of Hell is an enormously and infinitely large structure. Although ten stories high, it has basements and tunnels far and deep underground that crisscross and is filled with trecherous minotaurs and all sorts of creatures of horror and legend. Fortunately, only the important stuff was up top. More convienent that way for visitors to see the sights of Hell before going deep underground for an eternity of torture and despair. Black Mage was not going to see the sights. He was going to defeat all of the denezins of the place in one fell swoop.

"Hello, Mr.BlacK Mage, do you have an appoint-HURK!" The friendly guardman thing, a former human, was going to guide BM to the top of the tower without trouble or bloodshed. But Black Mage did not know that. He stabbed the man in the brain, killed him, and (with much bravado) slaughtered his way to the clerk's desk, got a map, and went into the empty elevator.

Black Mage instantly sensed someting was wrong. The music. There was elevator music. Painful, horrible and excruicating music that seemed to scream loathing at you in a cheap way that says "Doin fine" while coming off as tacky and unorigional/inspid. The wait was painful yond words.

Black Mage stood resolute. It was only music. It may sound of tackiness and be cheesy, but it was only music. Nothing bad will happen. Can't hurt you. It's safe. The elevator won't break down, or stall. Nope, no sir.Black Mage checked the map. Top floor, throne room. Tha's where he's gonna be. Cecking the elevator's progress, he was at the third floor.

"C'mon BM, it's only a stupid song. What can go wrong?" The elevator gave a jolt, and slowed down.Black Mage fell down, and nearly hit his head, had it of really existed.Still third floor. The music seemed louder. The air seemed hotter. Stuffier, dirtier, with more soot and heat. The light dimmed. "Fuggin matience workers!! I'll have them fired! This elevator is crap!"

As if the elevator had feelings, it have another jolt, fell downward a floor, and started back up and faster speeds, then stopped at the fourth floor, creeping upwards. Black Mage was tossed like a ragdoll, and hit everywall in the tiny compartment, bruises wanting to form but can't. 'Thank God I'm dead' he thought, heart pounding, sweating slightly.

At the ninith floor, the person moving device stopped. The numbers dinged, and the door opened oh so slowly. Onlookers reported seeing a little blue man prying open the doors by hand, bad music pouring out of it. His eyes were beady, tiny, bloodhot and reeling in the back of his skull,screaming madly,"MOVE OR DIE!" .They [onlookers] , predictablely, tried to move but suffered many stab wounds as a resuly of being slow. Life sucked for them.

Black Mage took the stairs for the next floor, his terror of the elevator lessening and calming down. He reached the top floor in record time, and opend the door with his boot. "Here's Johnny!" He roared while casting a Hadoken at whatever unforseen enemies lie on the other side, their tentacles, the claws, their grubling little eyes and multilpe heads and other atrocities.

Within the throne room, there once was a harem, full of all of Hell's best girls. Their existance was wiped out that very same day. It would have been a shame if Black Mage knew of them, but he didn't and killed them all forever.

"Mine! Mine mine mine mine, MINE!" Black Mage ran past the devastation he created in the vast room, almost childish in the way he coveted the crown of Hell. He barely noticed the entire floor iself, he just promptly declared him ruler, and was sent to the ground floor, millions of Hellions(people in Hell...get it?) looking at him, with angry eyes and hungry teeth.

Black Mages heart stopped, and blood ran cold. Instantly, the same happend outside, and Hell froze over, as cold as the ice of Black Mage's heart on a good day. He was in trouble.

"Uh..er..Bow before your new KING!B-BOW!" He yelped. He got no response, just the cough any comedian gets when he really bombs. The crowd store him down with an icy glare that made it even colder and harsher. Black Mage had to think fast.

"You know what's horrible, misshapen, and helpless?" Black Mage had one shot at this. Hell began to melt, rreturn to normal, and bvurn with a fury impossible to match under its new leader."That old guy who was all soft on ya'! Now you'll be like him!!" Black Mage uttered some words and made with the magic.

"What's that me-LORD THE PAIN AND HURT!"

"Suckers! I just removed your spines! NOW, swear allegience, or your torment will be unequaled in eight eons, and that's about all there is."Black Mage got what he came for. He got his rulership. He had won.

Unfortunately for him, this ten minuete ordeal only gave him enough time to finally taste true power, and abuse it rampantly among his 'playthings' in Hell.

The rest is history.
-----
EDIT: Critisice please. Would be helpful.Sorry if it is a tad long.